My head hurts and we're creative here.

I've been trying to ditch a headache for almost a week now.

Had it for three days on the left. Took a partial day off on Friday. Then it migrated to the right. I woke up at least four times a night to take medication. Excedrin. Migraine medicine. Heartburn pills. UGHHH.

So this morning I woke up with the headache on the right and it was so bad I wanted to puke.

It had been seven hours since I took anything, so I threw everything I had at it.
Two Excedrin, half a migraine pill and a vicodin. Then a heartburn pill because taking all that shit at once was definitely going to give me heartburn. Geez. Washed it down with a small glass of chocolate milk. Need that sugar boost to go along with it.

But you know what? It worked. I took all that shit about 7:15 and by 8:00 I didn't have the headache anymore.  I got up and took a shower. Felt so much better. But about 4:00 I had to take another half a migraine pill.

I can hear the more astute among you asking 'why only half a migraine pill'? Well let me tell you!

That shit is nasty.
Side effects are no fun.
Hot and cold and hot and cold.
Sweaty and quivery.
Lightheaded, although not dizzy or buzzed at all.

I have learned that a half pill will kick the headache, at least for six/eight hours without the nasty side effects. Or the occasional side effects aren't quite as bad. Also, if I take a whole one and it wears off in six hours or so, I can't take another until 12 hours have passed. And waiting 12 hours is just agony. Migraines aren't fun. If you haven't had one, I recommend that you do not.

I've been sitting in the momcave with Lyssa quite a lot doing crafty stuff. She's always been incredibly creative. There are tons of bits and pieces. Little wooden disks and sticks and little hearts and beads and all kinds of just stuff. A million sheets of scrapbook paper. Glue and paint and scissors and markers and colored pencils. And decoupage. Yarn. I have materials for almost anything you could think of.

It makes me happy to have my daughter here, making stuff. She's working on a diorama. I'll show you some pictures if she'll let me.

Meanwhile, last week I did a new ice dyed sweatshirt.
Which is now hers.

I love ice dye, you never know what you're going to end up with. I actually have another sweatshirt to dye, and a couple ideas about the colors I want to use.

And I have a buttload of other things ready to dye, which is this week's project.

I'm making some slipper socks for my dad, too. With his heart problems his feet swell and regular slippers are uncomfortable for him. So I'm doing some XXL diabetic cotton socks and putting non-skid stuff on the soles. I hope those will work and cheer him up a little. I'm making my mom a big t shirt with hearts on it to sleep in, also. I think tie dye is a cheerful sort of thing, don't you?

It's nice to have Lyssa and Mason here.
I am not lonely the way I have been since the world closed.

Um, where's the 'fuck off' button?

Apparently Microsoft wasn't content with the constant aggravation of their stupid automatically downloaded into my computer 'GET WINDOWS 10' thing.

Now, they are going to automatically download it into people's computers unless you manually disable the updates.

I just did.

If you don't want Win10 forced on you, look up your particular operating system and how to disable the automatic updates and go do it.

Pisses me off that I had to. It's like going to a used car lot and finding exactly what you want, only to be forced to buy the shitty beat up lemon that's been sitting there three years and pay extra for it. No choice.

So although I know just enough about computers to be dangerous, I don't want to change mine. I don't want a goddamn touch screen. I want them to leave me alone.

So this has been your public service announcement for today.

And in the fuck off department... woke up this morning at 3 with what has to be one of the top five worst headaches I have ever had. Oh. My. GOD.

I usually have a migraine pill stashed next to the bed. I can't open the fucking things without either scissors, a razor blade or a knife. They're so hard to get into. It's another thing that just pisses me off, actually.

A person with a migraine is already cognitively impaired, or at least I am.
Add getting out of bed at 3 AM in a COLD damn house, staggering around without a flashlight because I can't FIND mine, it went missing over the weekend and I haven't seen it since, my feet got frozen, I had to get water and spilled it all over myself when twisting off the cap, had to pee, had to get the pill down... all as simultaneously as possible.

Then I went back to bed and was cold and sick, sick, sick. I was sure I was going to puke. So glad I didn't. But that pill I took at three AM? Didn't really start working until almost six. I don't know if I could have driven to work if it hadn't finally kicked in. Then I had nausea until nearly 8. The nap I had after all that was sooo appreciated. Not long enough. But good.

Anyway, I took care of the Microsoft issue.

You've been warned. :)

I'm dyein' here!!

I have more dye on my hands this evening after making a conscious decision to try to keep my gloves on. I guess I didn't manage. :)

I bring shirts in for the kids to look a when we're getting ready to dye.
Chevron design, hearts, turtles, spirals, random circles, bars/stripes.

Yesterday I got them all out and showed them to Jason*. He's a sweet and solemn little first grade guy, very interested in the world. He asks a lot of questions and observes everything around him carefully.

I displayed the shirts, explained a little about how they'd look with our color scheme this year, and asked him which one he wanted to make.

He looked at the shirts I had out, considered carefully and said, "I think I'd like to make Thor's hammer."

"Dude. Sorry. That's not one of the options."

He looked surprised. "But that's what I'd really like to make. Can I just try it?"

I said he could, "Here are the rubber bands."

"Why do I need rubber bands?"

So I explained tie dyeing to him again. I don't know if he understood or not. He ended up making a spiral if I am remembering correctly. We're up to 29 shirts now, so I'm not really sure who's doing what.

This morning, I mistakenly gave a dyed shirt to the wrong kid. He went home with a girl's shirt inside double ziplock bags in his backpack. I called and left a message for his mom explaining the mixup. I told her that I would wash his shirt here at home and bring it tomorrow and she could do the little girl's shirt and do the same and we'd give them to the rightful owners tomorrow.

I rinsed out and washed the shirt this evening. It's eyepoppingly bright.
He made the ever-popular turtle on the front and random circles on the back.
It's in the dryer now.

Speaking of dry. I sort of forgot to drink enough today and now I have a headache. By the time I figure out that I'm thirsty, it's generally too late and the migraine has already hit me. This evening is no exception. So I'm outside half a dose of migraine medication and about 20 minutes away from going to bed.

Where I fervently hope that I manage to sleep tonight.
Last night I did not do very well in the sleep department, unfortunately.

But tomorrow is the last day of the school week. We have summer training on Friday and Monday off, so that means four days in a row that I'm not going to be up at 5. A bonus.

And four days ought to be about the right amount of time for me to lose the dye on my hands. Just in time to do a few more shirts next week, because there were some kids whose mom brought me shirts for them. They were not scheduled this week, though. So even though I'd like to be done after only a few days, they'll be doing their shirts next week.

Then I'll be done. Just in time to do them during the first week or two of summer.

:)

Feeling Crapulous

I have been arguing with a migraine since Wednesday.
In case you wondered, I hate it and it's not any more fun this evening than it was last night or the night before. Or the night before that or the night before that. Dammit.

It's nearly 8 PM right now, so I can't take any Excedrin, which I think would probably help. Excedrin wrecks my stomach and is full of caffeine, both are bad ideas when I'm going to be in bed a little over an hour from now.

The migraine medication works. It has side effects, makes me pee 8 times in a night, makes me feel like I'm just a consciousness, floating above the bed when I am sleeping. It's odd stuff. There is nothing even resembling a high when I am awake and I take it, mostly I just alternately sweat and freeze. Seems to really mess with my temperature regulator, unfortunately.

I have to decide... pee a lot and have weird temperature fluctuations or don't take it and have horrendous pain in my head and wonder if I'm going to barf for eight or nine hours.

So I take the medication. I still throw up sometimes anyway, but if I have kept it down for 30 minutes, it usually kills er, fights the headache to a draw/uneasy truce.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I found something interesting online this evening. I was visiting Dharma to get some tie dye supplies, and came across some stuff called 'color magnet'. My always-thinking-about-tangles brain instantly said, HEY!

I ordered two of the pens. Will see how well it works. The possibilities are intriguing.

And that's it, kids. Taking the headache and going to bed. Hoping to feel better, or at least no worse in the morning.

There is no school tomorrow, courtesy of Abe Lincoln/George Washington. Of course no one uses the day to celebrate presidents or politics, but it's nice to sleep in.

I'll be working a short shift. Hoping the headache is gone so I can take advantage of the extra time AM/PM and visit Goodwill.

Pass the Excedrin.

Aiyeeee the PRESSURE!!

So it's been hot. And when it's hot and humid, I don't feel great.
In addition, we have had rain and thunder/lightning this afternoon.
And now, I have a headache. Atmospheric pressure seems to play a huge part in my 'not hormonal' headaches.
Doesn't matter what causes them anyway... they're all a pain. And this one's making me feel sick.
::sigh::

I bought rocks and googly eyes today at the dollar store. We're making 'rock stars' tomorrow. Part of our 70s theme. The kids will love it.

I went to the craft store and bought the fast grab tacky glue, too. So many kids give up in frustration because the glue they're furnished is too runny and won't hold their projects together when they let go.

I think that's why hot glue was invented for adults. :)

So since they can't have hot glue, the kids get something special from me.

Anyway. I do have a headache coming on, and sitting here in front of a glowing screen isn't helping. So time for a headache pill and a shower and sleep.

Looking forward to this week at work now that I'm going to have some extra help. Thank goodness. :)

Ah that roller coaster week....

It has seriously kicked my butt this week... all the upset and angst and sadness and hauling stuff out of my site because I wasn't going to leave ALL of it there.

I had planned to leave some of the things the kids love the most, though. The ping pong net and paddles (a long cafeteria table works great as a ping pong table), the little foosball table, the pool table... some of the books, the little doll houses and cars, the art/drawing books I have put on the art cart... those things were staying.

I knew that some of my kids would really be sad if I left them, and taking their favorite toys with me would just hurt them more. Not fair, the situation wasn't their fault at all, and hurting their feelings wasn't an option.

The things that I couldn't replace without huge personal expense (big bins of Legos, for example) would have come home with me by today had I not received the news that I get to keep my benefits after all.

So now I get to start taking things back to work. I have decided to make an effort to do some organizing, though, as long as all that stuff is here. I don't necessarily have to have all of it at work, it just needs to be available for me when I need it.

But the ups and downs of the week have really whapped me upside the head this evening. I have a migraine coming on... no, wait. It's here. Wrapped around my head like an octopus or something. Ughhhhhh.

I am exhausted and my brain is running at about half power.

So I am going to bed.

Life is good, and I am tired.
:)

In a fight again...

Having a little trouble with a headache.

This is one of my 'doubles'. It's two headaches in one. Migraine medication takes care of one of them, then I have to take Excedrin to kill the other half. I know how weird that sounds, but there it is.

Right now I've mostly fought it to a draw. Sitting in the living room watching Olympic coverage that's two days old, fast forwarding through all the stuff that we don't care about, all the commercials, all the blah blah blah.

I'm getting ready to turn the computer off and grab my tangly stuff and draw a little while we sit. Working on a little seahorsie with some plants beside him.

We did manage the grocery shopping today. Our weekly date. I love hanging out with my man. He's still my favorite person to hang out with.

I want to try to write about an ongoing attitude thing in my program but haven't had the time and brain-without-pain long enough to manage it.

Kids have been doing zentangle stuff at work, and really enjoying it. I took in some of my graphite pencils and blending stubs for them to experiment with on Friday. They felt special, using 'real artist stuff' as Ariana* put it.

I have the tangle I posted here a couple days ago on the table where the parents sign in and out so they can see what the kids are doing. It makes the creators of the art work very proud to have people see their work and comment favorably on it.

So I am going to close the lid on the beast here and grab another Excedrin before bed, I don't want the headache back. Ughhhh.

Happy Sunday.
And on Monday, I don't have to work. Not getting up early, don't have to.
:)

Well High there!!

I had the beginnings of a migraine Friday morning. I took half a dose of medication as I was putting away my program, but by the time I got out of the principal's office and was on my way home, it was much worse. I took the other half of the pill when I got home, and laid down to rest.

I slept almost immediately, but it was a strange sleep. Each time I surfaced, I felt like I was floating about a foot off the bed. I could not feel my body. I was just... a consciousness.
It was the oddest thing.

By the time I had to get up and get ready for the afternoon shift the feeling had gone away and I was fine, but migraine medication doesn't usually do that to me.

I take half doses because it's really NOT good for a person. Raises BP, makes me hot and cold and hot and cold and sweaty and cold and hot and repeat for about four hours or so.

But there was no difference in how I felt an hour and a half after taking the half dose of medication, and this was a nasty headache, one of the kind that makes me barf, so I had no choice but to take the other half.

Friday night and into Saturday morning about 2, the headache came back. I had been up to pee about 6 times during the night because that's what the damn medication does to me, and when I got up a little before two, the pressure that had been just sort of sitting there, lazily spinning had morphed into a headache again.

So I took a half dose. Again I spent a couple hours floating above my bed. I thought for sure I was going to throw up that dose, but kept it down for more than an hour before it finally did come up. Uggghhhh.

I was awake so many times through the night that I should have slept in, but Eric had suggested we go Goodwill Hunting in the morning, and if you don't go right when it opens, it's overrun with people and noise and chaos. Not fun. I woke up without a headache, so we managed that little trip. After that we did the week's grocery shopping.

The three hour (!!) nap I took was probably necessary. A migraine of that caliber really does take all the fight out of a person. What's left is a quivering mass of _____< fill in that blank with the word of your choice. I needed the rest.

And tonight after hitting post on this, I am going to take another dose. Sadly, the pressure that's been there is ramping back up. I was hoping it was goodbye pressure, but instead it was 'hey, I'm still here' pressure.

So I am going to take a whole dose and just go to bed. Hopefully this will be the end of the headache for the month.

:::crossing fingers:::

Nothing but net

Haha... that's punny.

Haven't felt so great today, migraine hit me about 2 AM, then came back while we were out and about doing grocery shopping etc this afternoon.

Not doing too badly right now, but all I've been up to doing, really, is sitting here playing on the internet. Hence the 'nothing but net'.

I'm feeling okay, doing laundry, preparing for the work week ahead.

Eric made a nice dinner with potato salad, chicken and corn on the cob. Good stuff.

Matt is currently in Georgia with Amy visiting relatives, but I'm guessing we'll see him a bit this coming week. It will be good for him to see his 'Whisker Grandpa'.

Did I ever tell you why he's Whisker Grandpa? I probably did, but whatever.

We moved to Oregon when Matt was 21 months old. Not too long after, Bob came to visit, and we hauled the whole family to John Day to visit my parents.

Matt had two grandpas at once. So he started calling Bob Whisker Grandpa and my dad Regular Grandpa. Cracked me up then, still makes me smile now.

So we won't be seeing Regular Grandpa this time, they're not really up to travel right now, Mom is having some troubles medically. Again.
::sigh::

She's going to end up having a 'reverse' shoulder replacement soon. A tough thing to go through even when you're young, not so much fun when you're in your 70s. Takes awhile to heal. Times like this I wish I lived a little closer so I could help.

Of course it's not practical, I love my job, but I work for a reason. Groceries and medical insurance. Can't afford the time off. And even if it's covered with vacation time, leaving my site, especially at the beginning of the school year... not a great idea.

So I am going to bed early, even though I slept three hours this afternoon (thank you migraine medication) and putting the computer away for the evening.

Have you seen my motivation?

In my defense, I had a migraine off and on all weekend, and I'm tired.

I am also stressing out over work.

It's been an... interesting summer.
Actually an interesting year, since it was a year ago our abrasive supervisor left for greener pastures.

I am looking forward to getting back to my own site on September 9th. Where I can put my hands on anything I need in the back room, where there is no deferring to someone else regarding scheduling (if the kids need a change of scenery or activity level, I can just decide to do that without being told I'm doing it wrong) and I won't be working with anyone who doesn't share my love of the job.

But in two weeks we'll be having company and it's time for me to catch up with all the things that need to be done at home.

I love that Bob comes to visit us. He's a good guy, he loves my kids, they love him, and I know I've mentioned before that in our nearly 33 years of marriage, he hasn't said a single negative thing to me regarding how I take care of his son, my house, my kids, my life in general... not a word.

He's actually said to me that I'm the best thing that's ever happened to his son, that he is happy we got together all those years ago (so am I, really) and I appreciate that.

I even appreciate him coming to visit.

But we have to get the bedroom ready, we need to get a bed or something for him, nothing is done, the house is a mess, we have a ton of stuff to toss out (gonna have to rent a dumpster because part of what we have to get rid of is furniture) and I am tired, my feet hurt and I don't WANNA.

So if you see my motivation or you can spare some of yours, send it out this way, will you?

And I have some phone calls to make today. A couple of them are of extreme importance, and one of them has me a little... apprehensive. I know I'm doing the right thing, and that helps, but it's still difficult for me to do.

I am being deliberately vague because it's work stuff, but considering how I can write it up. I'd love to share, believe me. It's possible that I'll write it all up and then tell you that if you want to read it, email me and I will email you in return. That way I'll know who's reading.

Hm.

Trippin'

Took all the kids to Bonneville Dam and Fish Hatchery on Friday.

They seemed to have a really good time on the excursion, but their favorite part was saying 'the dam field trip.'

"Is it time for the dam field trip yet?"
"I can't wait for Friday and the dam field trip!"
"Can we bring our camera on the dam field trip?"
"Have you ever been on this dam trip before?"

::snicker::

I wore the fracture boot all day instead of a shoe, I knew that I'd be in really bad shape if I didn't.

Did a ton of stairs, lots of walking... the left knee had a lot of water in it this morning, but it seems to have redistributed this evening, at least somewhat. Thank goodness.

After all the stairs I expected to have sore muscles, but I really don't. The biggest problem I have continues to be the left knee, which will never be right again. But it does function at least part of the time. :)

In other news, my baby is home. Matt drove over from where he's living now and went to the airport with us. As we were driving to the parking garage, Lyssa's plane passed over. They landed about 20 minutes early.

We went out for dinner this evening, but Chang's Mongolian Grill has gotten very proud of their stuff... it was 15 bucks a plate... and not worth it.

Plus, the guys doing the cooking were flinging food all over the damn place and I ended up with a few pieces of onion and cilantro in my food. I like onions but they don't like me. And cilantro is a migraine trigger. It worked, too. Got hit with one as I was driving home. Took the migraine medication, but it's been about an hour and I am still feeling crappy, so I think going to bed and sleeping it off is the best choice now.

::sigh::

Heat, Headaches and (aww) The Happy Couple.

I'm relaxing next to a fan and ac combo.
It was hot here today, although it's going to get hotter and hotter through next Tuesday. Yippee.

I am not complaining too much (yet) it's a lot hotter in other places.
But I don't do well when it's hot, and I will hate the weather the next few days for sure.

My cousin posted a photo of the display from her iPhone today on Facebook. She's in Arizona, where it was 122 degrees.
Although it's not humid. Which is a good thing, right?
(But it's a DRY heat!!)

People laugh at that, but it's true. When it's not humid, I know I tolerate the heat much, much better. And although it's humid here, it's much more humid in other places. I've been in those places when it was 90 degrees (New Orleans in late August, for example) and it felt like 120 degrees outside. UGHHH.

It is hot here, though. After you pass about 82 degrees, I'm too hot. 92 or 93 today, up to 100 next week for a couple days.

I went out pretty early because Goodwill opens at 9. Got there by 9:15 and only found a pair of shorts for Eric. So not a total waste of time, I guess. :)

I had some pressure in my head, which I chalked up to the heat and the change in atmospheric pressure. I took two Excedrin when I woke up this morning so I wasn't feeling too bad by the time I went out.

Decided to stop at the grocery store since there's not a whole lot of food in the house.

I was wandering through the produce section, holding my celery in one hand and my phone in the other, waiting for my husband to call me back and tell me if there was anything he needed from the store when SHE walked by.

She had two children with her, about six or seven years old. They called her 'Grandma', so I guess they were related. :)

Grandma passed me.

And a scented cloud, attached to her like a parachute, wrapped around MY head as she passed.

What was the smell?
Why, I'm glad you asked!

It was a combination of old sweat, rancid grease and sex. With a really, really HUGELY LARGE goddamn big dose of some oily, flowery fucking perfume.

Three heartbeats.... WHAM. A full blown fucking migraine.

I wanted to kick that bitch in the taco.
I would still like to kick her, actually.

Home again, me outside a dose of migraine medicine, Matt and I decided that he'd go grab a lunch to go and bring it home instead of us going out.

And I ate and then took a nap. And woke up with very little pain. Yay.

Matt and Amy went and picked up their Uhaul and they both stopped by here to pick up this and that. I was going to take a picture of them with the moving truck, but blame the headache and the heat... I forgot. :(

So instead, I will leave you with a photo of the happy couple they took themselves sometime in March. I think.

What goes along with hormones?

Why, a migraine. Of course!!

I did my best to sleep it off after a dose of migraine medication, but it's been quite awhile since I had one of these headaches and it's just going to take over my weekend, I think.

We managed to get to the Gresham Farmer's Market today. I'm not sure why they call it a farmer's market, since I never see any farmers there, but whatever.

It is okay for people to bring their dogs to this open air bazaar, and just about everyone DOES bring the dog. I love dogs. But I don't think they belong in a big gathering like that, especially when it's hot like it was today. Not good for the dogs.

Leave your dog home. I seem to remember some arguing about this event last year or the year before, and the whiners got to keep bringing their dogs. You can't be away from your dog long enough to go buy some broccoli or get your knives sharpened?

Dogs are everywhere at this place.

People walk them in on the sidewalks surrounding the area, and there is a nice pile of crap or a random turd about every 10 feet on the  damn sidewalks all the way in.
Really, people... clean up the poople!!
Seriously.

Oregon has a law about bringing your dog into the grocery store, too. Not okay unless it's a service dog. Which is how little Foofoo, who is no bigger than a fart bucket and can only provide the service of humping your leg ends up sitting in the seat of the grocery cart. People can say the dog is a service dog and not have to produce a certificate or prove in any way that the dog is anything but a companion. And little Foofoo's filthy doggy ass sits where people's babies sit, or where Auntie Edna stows her bag of arugula. Have you ever read one of the studies about how much fecal matter is on the handles and in the seats of shopping carts? Yuck.

So I guess I can sum up by saying the hormonal headache is making me feel shitty. I have taken the migraine medication, have eaten something for dinner, and still the vise is gripping my head.

So I am getting away from the computer for the rest of the night.

I hope you have a lovely Mother's Day if you're a mom.
Eric is grilling steak and shrimp for me. My job is to boil the artichokes. Yum.

And one last thing.  If you have never seen Mother's Day on YouTube, click on that. It's hysterical. I have probably seen it 20 times and I laugh every single time. It's not long. Worth watching. Really.

And one more little thing. It has been a hell of a month, trying to get back from the horrendous illness that kicked my ass so thoroughly. I had a hard time making it through the days at work, managing to do minimal bill paying and laundry (as I sit here, the hamper is full again) and manage to write something for the blog.

I am sorry I haven't been great at responding to comments. I plan to get back to that now, went back a couple or three posts and did some answering today.

So I'm sorry I haven't kept up the way I usually do... but I'm working on it. :)

I stole this photo

In this photo provided by the Vatican paper L'Osservatore Romano, Pope Francis, right, and Pope emeritus Benedict XVI meet in Castel Gandolfo Saturday, March 23, 2013.

No, I wasn't there. I know, I'm a great photographer, but the Lego creation?? on the coffee table and the two guys in dresses did not come from my camera.

Disclaimer here... I don't intend any disrespect toward the Catholic Church or any of their customs and rituals and ways of believing.
Everyone has their own path.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I understand that Pope Benedict has retired.

Pope Francis is the new guy.

My question is, why does Benedict still have to wear a dress? Does he still have to wear a dress?

Couldn't he get a nice pair of Bermuda shorts and a tropical print shirt? Maybe parrots or palm trees. Coconuts. Something cheerful. Warm.

How about jeans and a t shirt and some athletic shoes?  The article accompanying the photo said that he was wearing the traditional white robes along with a quilted jacked for warmth on that day.

Surely the Church can afford to give the man a sweatshirt or some long underwear?

Regardless, I am willing to bet that none of those guys wearing dresses are required to wear pantyhose with them. :)

Also, both of them have my great respect, included in the story was an explanation of how they prayed together, using the same kneeler.

If I were to kneel, you'd need a forklift to get me back to a standing position.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Last night (Friday) I ingested some MSG. Ate something I've eaten before without checking the label. After I got sick, I fished the box out of the trash and looked. Evidently the recipe has changed. I know, I know... if I don't eat processed foods, I won't have that problem. What I really need is a personal chef and unlimited time and money.

So I spent today feeling pretty sick. A portion of the day lying down with a shirt wrapped around my head to keep the light out. And I've been in front of the computer for a total of two hours this evening and have officially reached my limit. It's making me sick to look at the screen.

Tomorrow I should be fine. Thank goodness.

An Open Letter to Dr. Reddy's Lab

Dr Dr. Reddy,

I would love to get my hands on beat the hell out of kick in the balls ask the sadistic asshole person who designed the packaging for the generic Sumatriptan that saves my life when I am slammed with a migraine... "WTF???"

It used to be a pain in the ass to peel off the thin layer of plastic on the back of the package and pop the pill through the foil backing, but after only a couple minutes of screaming, swearing, banging it against the wall and finally getting it open, relief was only an hour away.

Let me tell you something about migraines. A person suffering from a migraine is cognitively impaired. That same person is not physically coordinated, either. A migraine messes with just about bodily function you can think of, as a matter of fact.

So when you package your little pills one at a time in a blister pack that cannot be opened (except with a sharp object by a person who is both cognitively and physically impaired with a screaming headache) I can only suspect the package was designed by a sadistic dickhead.

I ask once again, what the fuck????!!?

I spent a little time on this Sunday afternoon perusing the internet to try and find out why those pills are packaged the way they are, thinking that maybe that information would be out there somewhere. I thought maybe I would open three or four of them, stick them in a well-labeled bottle and have them available for those times I get slammed and I don't have someone to help me open it. Yes, it is that difficult. I usually have to ask for help.

I can understand that perhaps the medication deteriorates with exposure to air or light, but there has to be an easier way to package the damn things.

My web search led me to the actual website for Dr. Reddy's. Sadly, after looking over the website, I am now not only pissed that I can't open the damn pills when I need them but now I'm nervous about taking the medication manufactured and packaged in India for fuck's sake.

Your website doesn't exactly inspire consumer confidence when there is not a definitive way to contact you for information. Oh sure, there are tons of email addresses on there, but none of them are specifically for a consumer to just ask a simple question, and you appear to have taken care to make sure people do NOT contact you with any consumer issues.

What really sucks is, my insurance insists I use the 'therapeutic equivalent' generic when possible. At least your generic works, unlike the one manufactured by Teva, which not only left my headache intact, it made me puke. My doctor had to write me a letter specifying which kind of generic I can use.

So I've decided to open four of your generic pills, rewrap in foil and stick them in a medicine bottle with one of those silica gel packs and hope for the best.

::crossing fingers:::

Mental

Monsters

Woke up at 6 and staggered into the bathroom. Felt some pressure in my head (and yes, a little pain) but I thought, 'I am just tired, I'm sure after I sleep a little longer that I'll be fine.'

Went back to sleep and dreamed of taking care of children who could not or would not do the things I asked them to do. Had a group that was bouncing off walls, hiding from me, throwing things at each other and generally acting like monsters. Although here's a funny thing... in my quest to find them something to do that everyone would join in on, I came up with a craft project that we can do at my school with materials I already have on hand!

Eric snuggled up to me about 8 and as soon as I moved, I felt this horrible bolt of pain. Migraine monster wrapped around my head. I asked him to get me a migraine pill because I was afraid to get up. And the manual dexterity required to get one of them out of its little blister pack is completely beyond me when I have a migraine. If I knew where to write or call to complain, I would. But the generic Imitrex comes from India. Of course on the other hand, about half the customer service calls go there...

So I got the pill down and went back to sleep until 10. That's when I realized I have a double headache. A migraine plus a regular one. I know how weird that sounds, but I don't worry about weird while writing on my blog now.. I've shared plenty here.

So the migraine is gone, but the secondary headache, the one that needed Excedrin, isn't gone yet. Another ::scooching around to look at clock::: 22 minutes and I should be feeling better.

That is, until I get into the shower. One of the side effects of the migraine pill (they're a vascular constrictor) makes me feel like everywhere hot water touches is sunburned.

So the migraine monster has (mostly) slunk off to wherever it is he goes when he's not wrapped around my head, the monsters in my dreams are happily making an aquarium craft project, and I'm heading off to the shower.

And how do you like that? I ended up doing a post today after all!!

How do you know it's the weekend?

Why, by the migraine, of course!

Slept most crappily on Friday night. Up and down and up and down and up and down... even though I was really sleepy I was having a hard time staying asleep.

::shrug:::

At seven on Saturday morning the migraine had arrived. I got outside a migraine pill and went back to bed. When I got up around 10:20, the headache was gone.

We did the usual weekend activities, hauled a load of stuff to Goodwill, did the grocery shopping, filled up with gas.

Eric barbecued some chicken wings and thighs, even though it was cold and rainy, someone rang our doorbell wanting to discuss Hitler
(I said, "I am familiar with him, and I don't do politics here at home. Thanks for stopping by.") I did some laundry and some dishes, a little tangly stuff, chatted with my kids, and just generally Saturday-ed.

And now, at 9 PM I am ready for bed. I don't feel too bad headache-wise, but the nausea has arrived with this one, so I am not going to ignore it. Getting away from the computer.
:)

I'm sure I'll be happy and hunky dory on Sunday, I plan to go Goodwill hunting with my man. How exciting is that?

surprise

Have a headache, it's one of the ugly variety. Medication, medication, and medication.

Tami said she feels sorry for my liver.. but I don't actually have one anymore. All the medicine just combines in my abdominal cavity and eats holes through my internal organs.

I did not sleep for shit last night either. I must have awakened 20 times after just barely skimming under the surface of sleep. Stressing and obsessing.

So not well rested, entering hormonal territory... recipe for a migraine.

Which is why I am going to bed at 8:15 tonight.

It's a short week this week, no school on Thursday or Friday, which is a nice little break, although we do have a training on Thursday to attend. But I won't have to get up at 5. I love not having to get up at 5. :)

My stupid head...

OH MY GOD headache from hell!!!

Do not ask me why I got it or where it came from or for goodness sake WHY the medication DID NOT WORK. I don't have answers for any of that.

Now I *can* give you the answer my 'doctor' in the dream gave to me just before I woke up about 3 AM to take a migraine pill.

"You have a large tumor in your prefrontal lobe."

Nice to wake up to.
The migraine pill did not do SHIT to stop the headache.

I took two excedrin. Two hours later, I woke up and it still hurt just as much, so guess what? I took ANOTHER one.

And when I got up about an hour after that, I was able to get a shower, but after that unable to function again at all. So I took two aspirin (yes, I know that's a fuck of a lot of aspirin products) went back to bed, told Eric to wake me up when it was time for another dose of migraine medication, and sort of slept.

The 2nd pill seems to have worked, at least for now. It's 7:30 PM. I took two online courses to maintain my certification for my job for another year, had a taco salad and a little bowl of ice cream, chatted with some friends online.... and bam, just like that, the weekend's over.

And although there are more exciting things on my mind than my headache, I find I haven't the _____ to talk about them.

Coming soon, though, more on the upcoming work comp hearing and assorted other shit that has me stressed out. I'm not at all sure that I won't be pursuing a claim for my mental state after all this. That's part of what I'm talking about right now with an attorney.

There's something wrong with my head

And don't think I don't hear a couple of you smartasses having fun with THAT title!!

Ugh. Up and down all night. Between nausea, pain, medication, having to go to the bathroom because of said medication, pain, pain, pain and pain and nausea and pain... I've been really savoring the whole migraine experience. Every little nuance.

I didn't sleep, really. More like drifted in and out of some sort of pain-soaked facsimile. (Did I mention that it hurts???) Nothing like going without a headache for a whole month to really appreciate the experience of one.

I had nightmares, auras, and a strange, feverish, disjointed feeling all night long. It's lasted into today.

Naptime.

Annnd... an update. It's Saturday evening about 8. Right now at least, the headache seems to be, hm, on hold.

Eric and Matt came home today instead of waiting until tomorrow, there were just too many cockroaches people out this weekend.

I woke up about 5 this evening with nothing but pressure on the left side. I'm hoping it will stay away, I still have plans to dye with my friends, just had to postpone it since there was no way in hell I was up to going anywhere. I would not have trusted myself to drive, seriously. Glad I didn't need to drive, but disappointed that I didn't get to dye today.

I will be getting up early and mixing dye and spending a little time having fun with friends... if there isn't anything wrong with my head when I get up.