Employer Comparison.... Then

I didn't expect to love this work when I applied at Champions (a division of KinderCare) in 2004.

We needed a little extra cash.
I figured it would fit into my schedule, I could still homeschool my kids and get them to various activities and bonus... I knew how to babysit* already. 

They were only able to offer me 10 hours a week at first, which was great.
That was October. By mid-December, I was working 30 hours a week.
Lots of turnover in day care.
Haha, trust me. Not everyone is cut out for it.

*After I started the job, I realized how wrong I was about the whole babysitting thing. 
There are people doing the work who haven't figured that out (and run crappy programs because of it), and some who took the job thinking it would be easy, but they get sifted out like (most of) the weevils in a sack of flour. 

Show of hands... who hasn't found bugs in their food on occasion? 
There are bugs in the day care business, too.

It was a wonderful fit for me and I enjoyed it. 

It didn't (and still doesn't, 22 years later) feel like work most of the time.

I worked in four or five different programs at first. 

Monday Here and Tuesday There and on my way to Somewhere Else on Wednesday only to get a call en route and a request to be at Another Place Entirely.

Being sent to several different sites is part of the beginner game in this line of work. 
They send you where they need coverage to keep the adult/child ratio legal. It's not easy, you don't know the kids, you don't know where things are kept, you don't know the specific rules of the program. Mostly you're just a warm body to keep the program legal. 

Ha, strictly speaking, Champions wasn't as concerned about legal ratio as they should have been. 

Still aren't, I keep in touch with a few former co-workers. I have no way of knowing how often they run out of ratio now, but I can tell you for sure they do it, they don't report it, and although those rules exist for a reason they DO. NOT. CARE.

Champions is still concerned with only one thing. 
Revenue.

I could tell them at least four ways for their company to make a lot more money without having to invest a damn dime, not that I would bother. 

I'd rather see the company fall apart. 
Unfortunately it won't, but they do restructure every six years or so to get out from under a bunch of discrimination lawsuits. It's possible they don't like people who look physically handicapped. 

One case I know personally, the site director used a wheelchair and was written up for 'not hanging children's art high enough' on the walls. Did that dumb cow Sherri offer to help? Hell no. What a bitch.

Assholes.

Anyway.
When I first started this job, some programs were calmer than others. The program I was routinely sent to on Wednesdays was a screaming madhouse. If that had ended up being my daily placement after a few months, I would have quit. 

I sure wouldn't be where I am now. The site director was a nice enough person, but she was terrible at keeping kids occupied. It was loud and chaotic from the time school was out until I left when the numbers dropped to 15 kids.

But Sunshine, who directed the only site that didn't make me feel crazy, asked our manager if I could be placed at her program permanently when her assistant quit. 

That was the beginning of a five year partnership. 
I learned from the best, seriously. I did not agree with everything she did, she was more school oriented in some ways, but she respected the kids and treated them with kindness and an appreciation for their individual needs. 

The site had been open for a little over a month when I began working there, the school was brand new that fall. I helped her build the program from a sixteen-kid group to 39 daily. By the time I'd been there two years, there was already a full program and a fall waiting list when school was out in June.

I didn't want to be a site director, said no at least eight times I can remember over the years, but I finally caved and accepted a site director position in August, 2009.

I stayed there until August 2016 and seriously, I think I'd still be there if it hadn't been for the absolute shitbag of a manager we got stuck with. ( The above mentioned Sherri/shitty manager is Sherri Burks and not only is she a terrible manager, if you believe rumors (my own beliefs are dependent on who's telling me the story and I am still in touch with more than one person who knows and I DO believe every shitty thing I've heard about her) she was eventually fired. Of course it was only 10 years too late for a whole bunch of people. 

Champions is a company with nothing but money-grubbing butt sniffers (my son coined that phrase when he was seven years old, I don't remember the context but it's funny, dammit) in charge.  

It's a toxic work environment when one has to deal with the idiots from corporate, but I mostly got to do what I wanted in running my site and the school itself felt like a second home, so I put up with more crappy treatment than I probably should have. 

I don't regret working there so long or so hard because I worked for the kids, but the company was (and still is) so disrespectful to the people who do the actual work that I'm not unhappy to have gotten away from them, either.

One of the ways they were disrespectful to us besides absolute shit wages was coverage of adult to child ratios. 
When I began working there, if more than 15 kids were expected after school, two adults were scheduled to be on site. 

If the second adult showed up and there were 15 kids or fewer, that second adult was given the option to stay for two hours even though the number of children was below legal ratios or they could leave.

Meaning the person on site was there alone and could not use the bathroom or take any kind of a break during the four or five hour shift.

About a year later, the company started sending the second person home even if they'd have preferred to stay if they weren't needed for ratio. So you could make child care arrangements for your own kid, get dressed, drive to a school within 10 miles or so, go into the building and be told to leave.

Spending money to show up and not being paid for doing so. 
Just one more shitty little thing they did to people.

You KNOW the salaried managers and regional managers and corporate posterior-smoochers were being paid for mileage and oh, they also had a paid-for-by-the-company car to drive around and nitpick everyone's work. 
It probably goes without saying that none of them could have done my job.

They were well-paid to use dismissive phrases like, "All they're doing is playing."

Vicki was an idiot and a jerk. Learned about kids from a book. No empathy for them and very little emotional intelligence/compassion/understanding. Bah.

Okay, so I learned how to work with kids. 
I thought I knew how. 
I didn't.
 
Worked for Champions for 12 years, would be there still if it hadn't been for the worst manager I've ever seen. Still, 12 years of paid training is 12 years of paid training.

Sherri apparently was pissed off that I quit and didn't let her know at the end of the school year. 

I didn't know at the end of the school year that I was leaving, actually.
Even though they treated me like crap once that ignorant cow took over, I figured I'd stay and outlast her.

But then I found a job that seemed like a better fit and wrote her a great resignation letter.
Not that she learned anything from it.

I'd still like to kick her in the taco.

Sadly, the ability to kick that high is probably lost to me forever. Doesn't matter, I won't get an opportunity to kick her any time soon.

I didn't get the new job until mid August that year, but I knew in plenty of time to give her at least three week's notice. I didn't bother doing that, instead I gave only 10 days.  I did that for my families, not for the company, I sent letters to them all. I figured word would get back to her that I was leaving, so I did the courtesy of letting her know via email.

In hindsight, I should have just not shown up on the first day of school. Since she blacklisted me after that anyway. 
"Not eligible for rehire".

I heard from more than one of my families that the program 'went to hell' after I left.
Not surprised.

About a year ago a reporter from a national news organization saw a post from me on social media regarding my experiences working for the KinderCare conglomerate. 

I strongly recommended to a person that working for someone besides KC was a good idea. I stated that there were many wonderful people doing the actual work, but that KC is a toxic corporation in my opinion and most people would be treated with more respect elsewhere.

I gave the reporter some information, taking care to keep it factual, and connected her with other people I'd worked with. Some of them still work there, some are no longer with the organization.

I've never seen an article about everything, but to be fair, I haven't looked, either.

Huh. Guess I should go surf the internet.

Okay, I'm back.

I didn't find anything with the reporter's byline, but I sure found a lot of stuff about toxic KinderCare centers.

Thing is, a lot of the people who work there actually care about kids. 
But management doesn't give a shit.

One more tidbit about them.

One summer, Brashley did a stupid and insisted on roller skating with the kids. She said she fell in the bathroom, ( still don't believe it)  so she had to go to a doctor. 

He put her on half a percocet twice a day, so she was bleating about taking mind-altering drugs and how she couldn't possibly work with kids. She ended up working at KinderCare corporate (another fucking waste of money, that place).

She was there doing filing when Jeanne and her cohorts, Asbury-who-we-all-called-Assberry and Vicky learned after writing a letter to the state that they didn't have to pay us for all of our training hours. 
And not required to pay for the courses we took (you can find them online and have them count toward your yearly training hours requirements) at all.

Something else that had made us feel a tiny bit more respected was being taken away.

Jeanne and Assberry high-fived each other when they got their response email from the state.

They were thrilled that they wouldn't have to pay us for our yearly required trainings.

Assholes.

I called Rob Martin on that one, though. 
Told him that if I wasn't worth an extra couple hundred bucks a year with all that I contributed, that maybe I shouldn't be working there.

After that, our trainings were still paid for, but we weren't paid for the hours we spent taking them unless it was a corporate sponsored session.

I'll say it again.

Assholes. 

It's a preface.

I'm writing something that's ancient history, but what I'm really doing is giving you the backstory. Some things are going on at my current gig that made me think of all this.

Now no one is a crazy power tripping hag, and everyone seems to have the best interests of children in front of them, so I'm not worried about their intentions the way I was with those crazy bitches, but the reasoning behind why we are always circumspect in our physical dealings with children is to keep them safe even when they're NOT with us. And so far, I seem to be the only person who understands that on a deeper level. There's still the thinking that, "Well *I* won't hurt a kid!!"
Usually in a tone of incredulity.
As if I'm suggesting they would.
No. That's not what this is.

I wrote about being molested by the teenage son of the babysitter when I was three years old, so I'm sure that colors my thinking about this. I was not traumatized, and my dad handled the situation the best he could, but the fact that that long-ago teenage boy had engaged in playful touching in front of adults was part of the reason I trusted him.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Back when I worked for the evil empire (Champions, a division of Kindercare. Where profit is the ONLY thing) that nasty human we had as our manager hired a bunch of her skanky friends.

Because it's not what you know but who you know, the fact that she did this over and over with multiple employers is out there (if you know who to ask... )
I know of three employers who won't hire her again. Can't blame them.

I still can't believe that bitch still has a job with Champions... or in any setting where she's allowed around children.

One of those shit humans Sherri dragged along everywhere she went wasn't just a worthless person, she was a danger to children, physically and emotionally.

Mykele was mean-spirited.

She deliberately hurt the feelings of the young people in her care. One of the people who worked with Mykele first and then came out to my site to assist me was stunned by how our little program worked in comparison.

Every few minutes she commented on how happy the kids were and how many things there were for them to do and how they were allowed to choose their own activities.

She had worked with the lunatic for a couple weeks and was actually ready to quit after witnessing how this asshole treated children every day.

One of the stories she told me involved a little guy named Matthew.
He was five. In Kindergarten.

This awful woman was very much in charge. It wasn't about the kids, it was HER program and only her ideas were good. She decided the kids were going to put on a play for their parents.

Every afternoon they had rehearsals, because, "It's going to be perfect!"

Since Matthew was small, his part in the play was small, too. He was expected to sit quietly on a cafeteria bench for about 35 minutes until it was time for him to say his one little line. Then, he would get up, stand on the stage and say it, and be told to go back and sit down. Rehearsal took at least an hour every afternoon.

I know you won't be surprised to learn that Matthew was a little fidgety. One lovely afternoon, the bitch attempted to make him sit down and shut up more than once, and finally walked over to him, shook a finger in his face and yelled at him until he crumpled to the floor, crying. Then she stepped over him!! and went back to rehearsing. She left that child lying on the floor, weeping. She ignored his anguish. Until she was tired of listening to him cry and went over, pulled him up by one arm and forcibly sat him on the bench. She told him he had better quiet down NOW. OR ELSE.

There were a couple other stories from the relatively new assistant. I did not see what happened firsthand, but I reported it to our regional manager anyway.

I went over our area manager's head because the once or twice I talked to Sherri (the ignorant narcissistic heifer who hired this awful excuse for a person) she did her hand-flappy-with-helpless-Texas-accent thing and said, "Gee, that doesn't sound like her!".
Boom.
Case closed.
You knew it wasn't going any further.

If we were unfortunate enough to be scheduled to work with Mykele during a school break program, we'd be working alone, more or less. She spent her time either texting or calling Sherri or interrogating us to make sure we were 'doing the curriculum' HER way. She wandered away with her phone, walking out into the vestibule, outside a bit. She went to her car a few times, too. I don't know what she was doing out there.

She brought in piles of candy which she ate in front of the kids, and she drank Dr. Pepper all day. She swore in front of them, too. Oh, not loudly, but when kids are there, you don't say fuck or shit or call your co-workers a dumb bitch. I know a couple kids did hear it, because we had parental reports about it. Which we passed on to Sherri (I did mine via email because having a written record which was date and time stamped was important)

While writing this, I read some of the really old emails I saved in case I'd need to have documentation. I'd forgotten that she asked more than one co-worker for narcotics, had put a hand up in a custodian's face when he asked her not to dump paint water in the kitchen sink and said, "I'm DONE talking to you!", invited a co-worker to a sex toy party about 30 seconds after they met and then I got bogged down in all the emails and I still cannot believe Champions pretends to be concerned about the children in their care when they still have fucking Sherri working for them.

So the worst thing Mykele did, at least in my opinion, was go INTO THE RESTROOM AND PEE WITH KIDS.

I wasn't there that day, but Karen was. Karen immediately told her that only one child at a time could go into the restroom and that she absolutely was not allowed to go into the restroom with kids.

I understand her reaction was ridiculous. She put her hand up in Karen's face, snapped, "I HAVE DONE NOTHING WRONG!" and waddled off, punching numbers on her phone so she could call Sherri once again. What a dumbass.

I don't know what her intentions with children were. I want to hope that she would never harm one. But for all her pieces of paper proving she was SMART and EDUCATED, she was one dumb hairbag.

Another letter

 One of the parents from the program I just left sent an email to the CEO of the organization regarding my departure.

She may even get a response, but they don't actually give a shit, if they did they would have made the small accommodations I requested of them.

If my doctor said I shouldn't be working a split shift and they weren't willing to help me get five hours a week to get minor benefits, then they don't care to keep good people anyway.

It was a hell of a letter she wrote, though. Here's an excerpt:
I am writing to express my sadness and concern at the departure of teacher Susan.  My children both absolutely adored her and thrived in her care.  When I asked her why she was leaving, she shared that it was due to being asked to work split shifts, and that the organization wouldn't be flexible with her about this. 

If this is the case, I truly find it appalling that the (cheap ass non-profit) wouldn't prioritize the needs of a 20-year veteran care giver, and therefore the benefit of children, over scheduling concerns.  (Nameless school)  already has a long waitlist of children needing care, and I can only imagine the negative impacts this has caused.  Susan was a strong and competent caregiver, and did an incredibly challenging job with warmth and aplomb.  I strongly recommend you review your policies.

There was more, but that's the gist of it.
I emailed her back and thanked her for taking the time to write it and send it to the appropriate party. Told her that I loved working with her kids and that I'd miss the whole family. I'm sorry she wasted her time, although I didn't say that, of course. Just thank you very much.

Mr CEO had no idea there was a long waiting list, as Madge and Rowan and others HID the list from him in the computer system they use. So I was happy to see that she mentioned that in her email.

If she gets a response and shares it with me, I will post it here if I can.

Anyway, it's 10 PM, and although I'm working from home tomorrow morning, I still have to get up and get my shit together at a decent time. Tired old bag here.

Say Anything

Kids are always really great. I had a wonderful group this year, and will miss them all. Some more than others, although every one of them is a valuable and wonderful person.

But so much went on the last couple months with corporate crap that some of the kid stories I wanted to share just didn't happen.

Malaya is 11 years old.
Just had her birthday last month, actually.

She says whatever she thinks as soon as it's on her mind, a characteristic of her particular brand of autism.

She's tall and beautiful, with high cheekbones and an amazing smile. She looks a lot like her mama, actually. Both of them are really great humans. Malaya notices everything, and has questions or comments about all of it. She is one of the most honest people I've ever known.

While that's not a bad thing, as I value honesty, she doesn't have a filter. The things that she says just... tumble out. She has no concerns about how someone might take her commentary.

Cammie and Oscar's dad is prematurely grey. He always takes a moment to interact with me, with my assistant, with the friends of his children. Very nice man.

A couple weeks ago, as he was chatting with me at pickup time, Malaya walked up to us, and in her normal manner interrupted our conversation.

"How old are you?" she asked Dad.

He smiled. "I'm 48."

"Well, you look like you're 90," she told him, and walked away.

Dad just lost it. He laughed so hard he had to get a tissue from the box on the table and wipe his eyes. At least he wasn't offended.

Later that week, a mom came to pick up her two boys. Mom and her partner are both very slender women with short hair. They dress in jeans and button down shirts, sometimes with a beanie. They're very nice, and the boys are just a crackup. SO smart and so full of enthusiasm for everything. The moms share custody with Dad, and often take the boys to events together. They're making their blended family work and everyone seems happy together. Oops, I'm heading off on a tangent here.

So Malaya was watching the interaction with Mom, her partner, and the boys from across the room. She walked closer to us and observed everyone. Then she said to Mom, "Are you a boy or a girl?"

Mom didn't even blink.
"I'm a woman."

Malaya considered a moment, then, pointing at Mom's partner, said, "Is that a woman or a man?"

Mom said, "That's Sharon. She's a woman. She's my partner."

Malaya looked a little confused, but said nothing. Started to walk away.
Then, she had that light bulb moment.







She spun back around and said, amazed, "OH! You're GAY!!!"

Mom and Sharon both laughed, and Mom said, "That's right. We're a couple."

Malaya clapped her hands and jumped up and down excitedly. In a pleased tone, she said,  "I figured it out all by myself!!"

Fortunately the moms weren't offended.
Mom actually works with autistic teens, so nothing anyone says bothers her.
Her partner is a very nice, open minded human as well, and there were no ruffled feathers.

I'll miss all of them, of course. Everyone was very nice to me there.

Malaya's mom works for the same organization I did in a different facility, she's also looking for a job. Malaya made several remarks about how horrible the company is, but I took care to say that I've mostly been happy working there, and that I've met many wonderful people in the course of my job.

Have to say she's the most straightforward one, though.

You say goodbye and I say hello. Hello hello?

Are you hearing music?
I love a lot of Beatles songs but they weren't great musicians.
Wonderful song writers. Not great at the technical stuff.

First day on the new job.
I was supposed to be there at 10, GPS said "24 minute drive" but I left my house earlier than I needed to just in case traffuck got crazy.

It didn't. I arrived a half hour early.

Sat in my car for a few minutes, but I'd rather sit in my car in the parking lot of my destination than sit in the car on the freeway, swearing about being late. Next time I'll bring my tablet so I can read if I'm early.

Today's training stuff was an orientation and tour of the facilities.
An hour and a half of HR stuff that could have been in an email, then a lunch order (sandwiches from Jimmy John's) and some computer time.

They wanted to make sure we could access our training websites, but it doesn't make sense to me that they wanted to do that today when we're not doing the training until next week. Ah well.

I'll be working during the mornings at the office this week and meeting my new young humans and getting to know the adult humans who work at my site as well.

I am going to be responsible for making sure their hours are correct for payroll and learn about their strengths and what they do at the school.

The morning shift at my school will be handled by one of them, I won't be working split shifts for this employer. I'll eventually be doing a bit of stuff at home, going to fix a work space this weekend in the momcave.

Yesterday afternoon, my last shift with my kids wasn't as hard as I thought it would be. Kids brought me gifts, I got handmade little cards, I got hugs. Ended up with 30 bucks to spend at Target and 50 for Amazon. Unnecessary but appreciated so much.

I didn't get all emotional. I've been fine, surprisingly.

It didn't rip my heart out the way it did when I left my other job six years ago.

My feelings weren't less, but I wasn't worn out from putting up with a year of harassment from a crazy narcissistic bitch before I left this time, either. 
I am sorry I had to leave, but it was the right decision.

I saw a couple of the parents for the first time since I turned in my notice, too.

One of them was furious and demanded some email information for someone above Madge. Apparently Madge was unconcerned about the emails they sent to her and summarily dismissed them.

But the organization made email addresses easy, C.ExecOfficer@CheapAss.org.

So I passed along the contact information for the CEO.

Madge and the rest of the gang have kept him in the dark about a few things, one being the size of the waiting list at the school. They engaged in some computer subterfuge to keep him from knowing, since he doesn't like kids being on a waiting list.

It's laziness on the part of some of his minions, instead of going to the school and trying to arrange a different program space (they used to be in the cafeteria and swapped back and forth between the gym and the cafeteria each day for a bit until SUN came in and took over the whole damn building ) 'cause minions sit in the office and do, well, I am not sure what they do.

The cafeteria/gym/cafeteria thing worked well, but after the pandemic, they got a new principal and the arrangement changed. The minions didn't try to fix that, they just let it go. Because the minions make the same amount of money whether they're doing a good job or not.

I wasn't supposed to know all that. Madge let it slip quite awhile back.
It's possible that I told all this to the few parents who asked.

I mean, what were they gonna do, fire me?

The person they hired to run the program there probably won't end up staying with the company, she's too smart and won't be content there. Company's not organized well enough and there are so many possibilities for her.

Not my problem, of course.

None of it is my problem anymore.

They said goodbye, and I say hello.

I've been replaced.

The person the cheap ass non profit hired to replace me is a very nice person.

I think she will do okay with the kids, she's not mean, she speaks to them like people, she's calm.

She's also very intelligent and has done some work with kids in a few of the jobs she's had.

Her story, so I won't tell it. But I'm confident that she will treat the kids with respect and that they'll be just fine.

I was particularly concerned that the kids be offered the usual fare... what I think of as a layered program, with open ended activities always available and at least one crafty thing or (loosely) guided activity for the kids, which is one of the reasons I am leaving a mostly stocked program for them.

I know, I paid for all that stuff.
But I could go out tomorrow with a few hundred dollars and buy all of it all over again if I needed to. I'm hoping the new job will do okay with purchasing needed items and that I won't have to bring everything in. Again.

But I wanted my kids to have someone who'd allow them some space and accept the idea of letting them decide what they wanted to do after school.

Obviously there's nothing I can do after tomorrow, I won't be there.
But I was hoping to get an idea of how this person will do with my kids.

Yes, I know. They're not really mine. Just from 2:15 to 6 on weekdays. But you get it.

Thursday is my last day. I went in early today and wandered back down to where my program was at first, said goodbye to the daytime custodian and the music teacher who's in my old classroom.

Both of them are decent people and ones that I'll miss.

Everyone at the school has been very kind and helpful and I'm sorry to have to go.

Madge's texts are very pissy. She takes everything personally, a side effect of some of what's happened to her in her life. It's not pleasant, but it's understandable. I don't hold it against her.

I actually don't hold it against any of them, I think it's ridiculous and short sighted, but they're limited in their ability to grasp the big picture, the organization is top heavy, some of the people running things should probably not be running anything, and round and round we go.

I've been careful to be honest with my families and with the school about what happened without saying bad things about anyone personally. Although an organization is made of people, what happened to me is not the fault of any particular person, if that makes sense.

And Madge is just, well, Madge.

I'm hopeful that I won't have to see her again. I won't be thrilled if she shows up while I'm there tomorrow.

Okay, bedtime. Been waking up five times a night to worry. And pee. Sometimes I worry about peeing. Ha. 

Letters

I patterned my farewell letter after the one I sent to the families when I left my last job.
I handed this one to people personally, though, the other one was sent via actual mail.

When parents arrived to pick their kids up yesterday afternoon, I gave them a folded piece of paper and explained that Thursday the 19th will be my last day with their kids.

I told them the truth, that my hours were cut and I was no longer allowed to be full time. That I'd spent the last two months trying to fix the situation, coming up with several ideas to work those five or six hours a week to fill that gap, only to be refused over and over by my employer.

I said that leaving was the absolute last thing I wanted to do, but that I wasn't willing to tolerate disrespect.

I choked up during a few of those conversations, they really have been wonderful to me there.

All of them were unhappy, some righteously pissed, some just crushed.
One mom said immediately that she was going to pull her kids from the program right away, one of the dads said the same thing.

I felt like a wimp, kind of... I didn't tell the kids myself, I passed that task on to their parents. I knew the kids would have questions and comments, which is okay, but I was worried that I'd cry while telling them and that would cause some of the more sensitive little souls to feel worse than they already were going to.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It's tough to write this letter.

My wish was to remain at ______.

Unfortunately, I won't be able to do that.

 

I wanted my families to know that it's been a joy to spend time with your children.
Every single one is an amazing individual.
 

I've loved all of it... the noise, the messes, the busy-ness, the humor, the hugs, the silliness, the pride I've felt as I watched them grow and knew that I was contributing to their positive development.
 

I can't put into words how much I will miss each of them.

 

And you, the parents.

The people who treated me with such respect.

 

You trusted me with your incredible young humans.
 

It's been a privilege to be part of your lives.
You made me feel like part of your family.

I'll miss all of you.

 

Every child teaches me something. Their honesty, their sense of fair play, their depth of feeling, their joy in simple things... all of those are renewed in me by being with them.

 

So thank you from the bottom of my heart for the gift of being entrusted with your children.

_______ has been one of the best places I've ever worked and my families are the reason why.

 

Please feel free to keep in touch.
You can reach me via email @ _________.

Thanks for everything.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I figured I wasn't going to get a copy of the email Madge sent to the parents, and I was correct. I saw it, though. One of the parents was happy to show hers to me.

In it, Madge said that 'Both Susan and Brenda are leaving next week. It's difficult for the ______(non profit that can't afford to pay an extra me six hours or so a week) to staff, due to illness and people leaving their jobs.

There was more, blah blah blah... she assured them that she was PERSONALLY going to come and be at the program until they get things figured out.

She made it sound like we were inconveniencing her, and I suppose we are.

Later this afternoon, I got a text message from her. Let me get it. Don't go away....
She got an email from 'a parent' asking why this has happened. She didn't bother to tell me which parent. Guess she thinks  it's confidential.

She said, "I explained I was not on a full understanding reason either except that it was time to move on from _____ (cheap-ass non-profit) for the both of you as your decisions. So I don't know if more of your parents are seeking a better response but it's not something I can answer."

I answered, "Must be someone I didn't tell in person. I can't speak for Brenda, but you know why I resigned."

She said, "I also can't tell parents."

I told her, "That's okay."

I refrained from saying something like, "Hey, no problem there, Madge baby! I told ALL of them exactly what happened."

But since she's going to be there this coming Friday and every afternoon until the program ends up getting shut down because they can't get anyone to run it, I guess she'll find out that I told them.

Not my problem.

Do we have a staff infection? I think we have a staff infection.

So my assistant, who loves the kids and has been a great sidekick this year turned in her notice, too. She had been considering it, she doesn't want to be there without me. She's worked at several different sites and hated it. More than once she's commented on how I do things vs how everyone else does them and wondered aloud why the company doesn't want to do better.

I did not know she was going to quit for sure, but she's not ready to take on the entire operation with all the paperwork and licensing requirements and day to day busyness and stress.

I handle it fine... but it took a lot of training and experience to get to that point. She doesn't lack motivation or intelligence, she's just... not ready yet to run a program.
A year or so, though, and she would have been. So they're losing someone else who would have been an asset.

Over five fucking hours a week.

Short sighted at best.
And how DARE they complain?
The situation wasn't our choice, now was it?

She had an interview somewhere else today, but I haven't talked to her, her husband became ill (he drives long haul truck) and she had to take the afternoon to drive almost to Seattle to get him.

Madge seemed a little put out, her first text message of the day (there was a barrage of them) saying, "I assume you've told your families."

"Well, no. I haven't. My intention was to tell them on Friday afternoon to give my kids three days to process the information," I told her.

So her next message was that I'd better tell them, since she needs to email them first thing in the morning so she can 'try to reassure HER families (meaning mine)  that they're going to TRY to keep the program open'.

She commented that 'now we have to deal with two staff leaving in the same week'.

Oh gee, I'm so sorry that it's an inconvenience for you. Here, have a tissue, you fuckin' crybaby.

Perhaps if you didn't think of us as staff and called us people instead? I mean, that wouldn't fix everything, but just that one little step would help. Maybe next time you have one of your full day 'training' sessions, instead of sitting in a group and sharing your pronouns, you brainstorm ways to speak to/about the human beings who work for your organization that aren't condescending, patronizing or dehumanizing.
"Staff."
Good god.

Or, hey! Here's a thought! Stop considering us as interchangeable widgets.

Stop sending my assistant and everyone else to programs that are loud, out of control and run by crazy people.

Get some fucking program standards and stop letting people like Axel run programs until he pulls his head out of his ass. He's certainly not the only one, the school where they wanted me to work mornings is being run by the most arrogant bitch I've met at this company. And let me tell ya, to win that prize you have to be abominable.

Rewards for picking up LEGO. For cleaning up the art table. She did do one thing I  thought was okay, instead of yelling at a kid in front of other kids, she took the children aside and had conversations with them about their infractions.

But is it really an infraction on the child's part that you put things that you don't want the kids to touch out on a table?

Small idea here... maybe don't get them out until you're ready to use them.

Just a thought. Reacting with surprise and/or anger because they put their hands on craft supplies you weren't ready for them to use (and didn't bother mentioning) is, well, stupid.

And announcing that you're withholding 'some' of their recess time because they "weren't behaving" is a shit thing to do, you power-tripping asswipe.

It's a fucking school break program. They're excited to be at a location where they don't usually attend school/program. There are new toys and new faces and a completely different routine.

Let's not forget the fact that many of these kids come from programs where there are few, if any, standards.

Say it with me.
We need program standards.
Or I guess at this point it's they.
They need program standards.
I still have mine, which I'll be taking with me when I leave a week from today.

So I talked to most of my parents this evening. I did not have full attendance today, so some of the parents are going to find out via Madge's email. I have no idea what she's going to tell them, and I doubt she's going to bother to copy me on the mailing.

But I didn't lie to my families.
I told them truthfully that I've been trying for nearly two months to fix the situation. To find a way to work those five or six hours that doesn't involve going against medical advice.

That I offered to work at the school.
That I offered to write lesson plans or write up craft projects.
I was willing to help any way I could to keep my hours each week and my full time status. And that no matter what I said or proposed, the company shrugged it off.

After calling me unprofessional for not just accepting their decree, that is.

Apparently emailing and protesting is 'unprofessional' and 'inappropriate'.

I can see them being a little pissed off if I'd sprinkled in words like dipshit or asshole or called them a conglomeration of clusterfuckers unequaled in the known universe, but I did not.

It's probably a good idea for them to avoid talking to me for a day or two.
Email or text will be okay. Until it isn't.
I practically had to sit on my hands today to keep from replying to Madge's, "It sort of leaves us in a bind."

Because,  "Huh. Guess treating people like shit comes back to haunt ya, huh?" would probably be considered unprofessional, too.

I feel like it's slightly more professional than, "Oh yeah? Fuck you!" though.

Bye, now. Thanks for the kick in the pants.

 

Thursday January 19th will be my last day at the _______.

(non profit that couldn't afford to pay me six hours a week to maintain my full time status and benefits).

Thank you for the experience, I've met a lot of wonderful people.
Not all of them were kids, either.

It's my intention to leave behind all the supplies I've personally purchased for the program at _____ with the exception of my own collection of LEGO and a few small things that have sentimental value to me.

I will continue to work to organize the program until my departure. We've managed to do most of it since the move in October, but there are still some things to go through.

I'd intended to accomplish that over winter break until I was sidelined by the weather and the prospect of possibly being stranded on the freeway.

I'll be happy to show the person you replace me with where everything is and how our routine works to ease transition for both the kids and the ________.

(non profit that couldn't afford to pay me six hours a week to maintain my full time status and benefits).


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I sent it after close of business this afternoon. It's not quite two week's notice, I will be starting my new job on Friday the 20th. It's possible that I could work the afternoon shift at my current school, but whatever. If it weren't for my kids, I would have told them to piss off as soon as I found another job, but it's not about who THEY are, it's about who I am. And I'm not that person, I guess.

Like I said, I even gave notice to those morally bankrupt shitbags at Champions, and if anyone deserved to be left without notice, it was them.

It would be really easy to just take a bunch of stuff that doesn't belong to me.
Although I'm not sure what I'd do with some card stock, a few games or some masking tape. I have that stuff at home.

Now the hard part... gotta tell my families.
Not looking forward to that.

So, Seven Years ago..

I didn't work hard to write up the incident at the time because those nasty shitbag work comp fucks were monitoring my blog and I didn't want them to be able to find anything that might be considered identifying information.

But you know, it's been seven years and unless you know me, you don't have any idea where I used to work or the real names of any of the players.

Which of course I still don't use here.

Real names and locations are always changed for the protection of the kids.

I had Savannah in my program out at our little country school.
She was there every other week. I only had her in my group when she was with her dad. During Mom weeks, she got on the bus after school and went to her mom's house.

We had a weekly contracted schedule that told me which kids were to be with me on which days. Scheduling was done by the parents via the company website, and I had the weekly schedule sent to me.

Since we were out in the country, the kids were either picked up after school or rode the bus home unless they were in my program. Which meant that if a kid went home on the wrong day, he or she could end up in an empty house.

So when I'd had Savannah one week, then the next week she'd been with her mom after school and the next week I was expecting her and she didn't show up in program, I had her taken off the school bus and brought to me.

She was crying and shaking when they brought her down to the cafeteria.
"I'm supposed to go to my mom's!"

It seemed like a rather large reaction to a small thing, so I assured her that we'd call and make sure she was in the right place and that I had her dad's number and that I'd check with him in a few minutes.

She wasn't comforted. She continued to cry, sitting on a bench and saying occasionally, "But my mom is going to be so mad!"

I had a few kids that day who hadn't shown up, and had to make calls to find out why. When I got her dad on the phone, he said that he didn't know why the schedule was off, but that she was supposed to go to her mom's house.

"I'll give her a call," he told me, "And she'll come pick Savannah up, she only lives about two minutes away."

So about five minutes later, the office called me and said, "Savannah's mom is here, do you want one of us to come down and get her?"

I said, "No, I made the call to take her off the bus, I'll escort her out."

So I handed the gang off to my assistant, had Savannah get her backpack and coat, and we went up the hallway and out the front door, where there was a car idling in front of our entryway.

I put on my best friendly face, walked around to the driver's side of the car and prepared to introduce myself while Savannah got into the back seat next to a car seat full of baby brother.

I wasn't able to even say my name before Mom started calling me stupid and a goddamn idiot and liberally sprinkling 'fuck' and 'shit' and 'asshole' into her rant.

She ranted at me for a minute or so, while I stood there, dumbfounded.
Every time I tried to say something, she screamed over the top of me.

She said that, "This is the tenth time this has happened this year!"
"No, it isn't!" I told her. "This has never happened!"
"Are you calling me a fucking liar??!?" she screeched.

Poor Savannah was huddled up in the back seat looking embarrassed and ashamed.

I wasn't able to say much of anything, she told me I was incompetent and OBVIOUSLY didn't GIVE A SHIT about the kids, that it was a wonder I still had a job but that after SHE was done with me, I wouldn't HAVE a fucking job.

Such a pleasant person.

So I finally realized that there was nothing I could say or do to change the situation, told her one more time, "Sorry," and turned to go around the front of her car and back into the building.

She stomped on the gas pedal hard enough to make the tires chirp, steered her car at me and at the last possible millisecond whipped the wheel to the left and missed me by three inches.

She ran the stop sign at the end of the driveway and pulled out into the road in front of a truck, flipped him the bird when he honked at her and screamed, "FUCK YOU!" at him.

I guess she wasn't in a very good mood that day.

Follow the Money part 2

Jeanne, our new manager, seemed to understand what we did and how we'd accomplished it. She was someone I liked on a personal level, too. But she was full of, um, issues. A lot going on in her personal life. It made her flaky and unreliable. Sometimes she didn't even make it to work for days at a time.

Then, just before spring break one year, a huge thing happened in her personal life, and had it not been for the way we were accustomed to running our own programs, getting the things we needed when we needed them and being goddamn good at it, the wheels would have come off the bus.

We made her look good although that wasn't the goal.
We only cared about what was good for the kids and our programs.
Every time the local emailed "Here's What's Happening at Corporate Daycare!!" came out, our district was mentioned for this or that innovative idea... and the credit was always given to Jeanne.

Like this blurb about my program:
"At Excellent Elementary, they have been doing some serious STEM activities."
They'd expand on it a little, then say, "Area Manager, Jeanne Arrogant"

Notice they didn't mention my name, only the manager's name.
As if she had a hand in it.
I furnished the goddamn supplies and the idea was mine, too.

Spring Break was successful that year because we all raided our own sites for materials, Sunshine did the planning and scheduling and worked harder than the rest of us, something she always did. Our manager didn't even put in an appearance that week. She didn't call to see how things were going, either. I don't blame her, the thing that happened in her life really was huge. But she should have asked for leave and we should have had an interim manager or at least a person we could call to purchase needed items.

The fact that we could pull off such a huge undertaking with no support from any sort of management made us all feel good, but no one ever thanked us for stepping up and making it work.

Surprise.

I will say that Jeanne understood a thing that others might not have figured out. She commented, more than once and to more than one person, that the things we specialized in were what set our programs far above the other ones she'd seen. And that taking those specialties away and making homogenized programs would be like taking the magic wand away from a magician.

She understood that our programs were outstanding because of their differences. That we put our kids first and because we were, oh I don't know what damn word to use that hasn't been OVERused... intentional with everything we did, families placed a great deal of confidence in us. Our programs were strong, we had a stellar reputation in the community, and the break programs, despite zero support from corporate types, became destinations. When the competing programs in the area still had plenty of openings for summer at the end of the school year, ours had been filled for a month or more. With a waiting list.

We knew our families and their needs, too. Our program was one of the only ones in the area willing to work with people's schedules. We had a lot of kids whose parents were police officers, firefighters, paramedics and nurses. Instead of charging people for full weeks, we had some flexibility. People really appreciated that.

We had what I call legacy kids. The younger siblings and cousins and neighbors of kids we'd had in the earlier years. What we built with our hard work and willingness to do whatever we needed to do was something we were all proud of.

Sunshine told me once when we were discussing the differences in some of our programs that the deciding factor is being invested in the job.
Not necessarily a monetary investment, either.
A heart investment.
A wish to make a difference.
To provide a place that's not just okay.
To provide an environment and a feeling for the kids who attend that it's a place of learning and fun and a place where they're valued for their intelligence and creativity.

We were deeply involved with our programs.
We had an amazing team. And although we'd had a crappy manager when we got stuck with Caustic, Jeanne at least recognized what set us apart. She seemed to appreciate it, at least when she was around.

There were things about her that weren't incredibly helpful, but she was mostly honest with us and seemed to appreciate what made us unique.

Okay, so you remember Brashley? If you've been here a long time, you do.
You can put Brashley in the search field up there ^^ and roll your eyes if you want. But here's an excerpt from one of my posts about her.

However, you've heard of 'the fly in the ointment' right?
Although really, I sort of prefer to think of the bovine, obnoxious, power tripping Brashley as a turd on the picnic table of life.

Would you be terribly surprised if I told you that I really don't like her?

In fact, I said just this week that she's so abrasive that I'll bet when she wipes, she shreds the toilet paper with her asshair.
Is that uncomplimentary? I suppose it is, really. And I probably shouldn't say shit like that, but the woman just pisses me off.

I have been trying to think of a redeeming quality (supposedly everyone has at least one...) to add some balance to this post, but after really pondering, the best I could come up with is that she organizes a baby shower every time one of the staff members has a baby.

And then proceeds to order us around when we show up to celebrate and give presents. I meant to post about the last baby shower she presided over, but never got around to it, but as usual, she pissed everyone off inside 20 minutes. She can make an hour seem like a week.

Brashley wasn't 100% a horrible person, but when presented a choice of being kind or being an asshole, she chose asshole every time. I guess on occasion she wasn't presented with the choice of being an asshole. She did do some decent things during the time we worked together.

We went roller skating as a field trip during summer the last year Brashley was with us. She made a huge deal of putting on roller skates and skating with the kids.

She bullshitted about 'needing to watch the kids' but it was a private party and was just us. There was no stranger danger. We watched from the sidelines, mostly. Brashley did okay skating. But she was a little wobbly.

Then, when NO one was anywhere near the restrooms, she went in and came out and said she had fallen. I didn't believe her, no one else did, either. So she had to go to the doctor, who prescribed HALF a percocet twice a day. Then she made a really big deal of how she was on MIND ALTERING DRUGS and couldn't possibly work with children.

So they shuttled her off to corporate for a few weeks. She was there doing filing when Jeanne and her cohorts, Assberry and Bitchy learned after writing a letter to the state that they didn't have to pay us for training. OR to pay for the trainings.

Something else that had made us feel a little more respected was being taken away.

Jeanne and Assberry high-fived each other when they got their response email from the state.

They were thrilled that they wouldn't have to pay us for our yearly required trainings.

Assholes.

I called Rob on that one,though. Told him that if I wasn't worth an extra hundred bucks a year with all that I contributed, that maybe I shouldn't be working there.

After that, our trainings were still paid for, but we weren't paid for the hours we spent taking them unless it was a corporate sponsored session.

Jeanne moved to a different area of town and rather than driving back and forth and back and forth in the ridiculous traffic we have here, she transferred to another district and we got stuck with Fluffy, the Killer Bitch from Hell.

I don't want to repeat all the things I've said about her here, but hey,feel free to click on this link or this one or even this one and learn a bit more about her if you're new here. Or put Fluffy into the search field. Just reading back over that stuff has triggered me. I think I may need a safe place and maybe some comfort food.

I will never forgive her for being an asshole. For hiring her shitty friends and for turning away from the kids when those same friends were straight up abusive to the children.

Follow the Money part 1

The arrogant and mostly useless mid-level 'managing' shitbugs who worked for...no, wait... were employed by the company I used to work for took great pride in shitting on the lower level people.

And what was lower than a glorified babysitter in that company?
I'll bet you can guess.

Even though we were the ones providing the programs and, you know, actually earning money for the company.
What's lower?
Nothing.

When I started working there in 2004, we were treated with a fair amount of respect and appreciation.

For example: The company had a rule that if you showed up for a scheduled shift  and there weren't enough kids in attendance for your presence to be legally necessary, (legal ratio is 15:1,over 15 requires two adults) you got to make a choice. You could stay for two hours and be paid for that time or you could decide to leave.

You wouldn't be paid, but it was your choice.

Then some penny pinching fuckstick(s) decided that they'd no longer do that. So it could (and did) happen on occasion that a person could spend an hour or so getting ready for work, drive to whatever location he or she had been assigned to for the day, sometimes 20 miles in this area, and stay until all the kids were out of school, learn that only 14 of the scheduled 18 had shown up and then have to turn around and go back home. Between getting ready and driving, a person could spend two hours in preparation for working a shift.

If you figured out from that description that people were spending money to go to their job, you're pretty smart. There were a few who got stuck like that multiple times in a month and chose NOT to quit, but many more who figured out quickly that the company didn't give a shit about them and quit even sooner.

Those same mid-level shitbugs were always wringing their hands and wondering why people didn't want to work there. Most of them were a special kind of stupid.

Georgia, the manager who hired me was actually really good. She was kind, had a great sense of humor. Remembered our birthdays and other events, made sure people were enjoying their jobs. The KIDS liked her, and there is not a better barometer than that.

Unless it's a dog, dogs are great at judging character, too.

But when she had to sub at a site or fill in when there were too many kids, she always got along really well with the kids. In addition, when there were floors to sweep or mop or other chores, she wasn't afraid to pick up the damn broom.

Unfortunately she left in 2011.

Then we got Caustic as a manager. She would have been an insufferable asshole anyway, but since we'd had Georgia, Caustic looked even worse than she might  have. What a dipshit. Go read those links, you won't believe one person can be such a jerk.

She was PROMOTED by the way. Moved off to Texas. Where her spiritual bad breath made a lot of people sick really fast and got fired. And good riddance.

Fair to say I don't miss her.

Her replacement arrived a few weeks later.
I didn't hate her, but she didn't inspire a lot of love, either.

I actually have a point here, but it's sort of in the future. Like the next couple posts. Funny, I didn't start out planning to get long winded.

Geez.

Now I have to add 'part 1' to the top of this.

the more things change...

Talked to an old co-worker today.
On the phone.
Mabel.

Which is weird for me, most of the time I don't like talking to people on the phone these days. It's not that I don't like the people themselves, I just hate sitting in one spot and not moving while I talk because my house seems to have issues with cell phone reception.

Probably an ancient Yuppie burial ground.

So yeah, back to the co-worker.
I think I've told you before that a hyphen appears in that word so that people don't misread it as cow orker.
If not, consider this official notice.

Up until October of last year Mabel was still working for the assholes I used to work for.

A little background. Fluffy took Mabel's original site away from her without an explanation or any notice. Seems there wasn't a site open for her good friend Twatwaffle at the time, so she just gave her Mabel's site.

Mabel protested. Big Fish was called in and after some really crazy bullshit story about 'parent complaints' which Fluffy would not share, citing confidentiality, the decision stood.

Bogus reviews, which Mabel had never seen or signed were brought out. Big Fish didn't even question that. What a doorknob.

But Fluffy went through so many employees! Word gets out when an employer is a shitbag, too. A good indicator is a constant presence in the want ads. If someone is constantly looking for people to fill positions, that's one sign that you may not want to work there.

So suddenly Mabel was qualified again and given a new site to work in.

Mabel was setting up her site when a rug she was moving unrolled and she tripped and fell. Broke her femur. She was taken to the hospital by ambulance. Had to have surgery. Then a few days later there were some complications and she was operated on again.

The company has denied all of her comp claims. Which isn't a surprise, they routinely deny everyone's. They denied one of mine, too. Not that it did them any good, they eventually had to pay.

There is pending legal action. She'll win, of course.

Here's the really lovely part, though. She was vocal about the denial, although she hasn't been able to return to work. People were talking about it.

Fluffy caught some of the stuff being said.

So she went to several people at several sites and told them in person that they were NOT TO SPEAK to Mabel. At all. And hinted that the penalty for being caught talking to her would be serious. A firing offense.

Three different people told Mabel about the threats. Of course Fluffy didn't get to her current position without learning how to cover her ass, so there isn't anything in writing. Apparently at least one of the people concerned is willing to testify in court, though.

I want to make some popcorn and go watch the show.

Then, I got the monthly newsletter from my current employer. Fluffy's husband works for a different division of the company, meaning I don't see him or interact with him in any way, thank goodness... but one of the little stories mentioned Fluffy being a teacher (she was, about eight years ago... and was about to be FIRED when she quit, went to her school in the middle of the night and cleared her things out just before midnight) and how wonderful that this young man she had in her class was now working for Mr. Fluffy in his division of the company.

Fluffy isn't a teacher now, although she calls herself an educator.

I suppose that's partially true, I sure did learn a lot from her.
Narcissism 101.
I know a lot of signals to watch for now.

I still want to run into her sometime, but not with my little car.
I want it to be when I'm driving around in the big truck.

I did it.

Woke up at 3:35 this morning. Tried to go back to sleep for an hour or so, finally got up and showered. Considered what I want to accomplish over the next two weeks.

I said, "Self, you really should do laundry. You should not be going anywhere. You have all these days stretching out before you and you always feel bad when you don't get everything done. Or ANYTHING done."

But then I looked at the clock. I had to go to the grocery store and get some juice for Eric, we'd forgotten it on Saturday when we did the shopping. It was 8:30 AM. Which meant I could go to the store, grab the juice, get back in my car and be sitting out front at Goodwill when they open.

To the uninitiated, that might not seem like a big deal, but to a person who really dislikes noise, crowds and busy-ness in retail establishments, it's huge. Get in when it opens, hit the spots I always go for and be out before 9:30.

I'm considering driving to another one tomorrow morning to repeat the experience, actually. I didn't buy anything, but the possibility was there.

Goodwill is like a freshman senator. Full of exciting possibilities. Also full of crap. You have to time it right. And it can still go either way.

I got back into my car and considered whether to make a left or a right turn out of the parking lot. A right turn would send me toward home. A left turn... well.
I've been considering that left turn for about 17 months and been unable to do it.

Oh, I tried it a couple times.
Got about halfway there and couldn't finish the journey.

Today I did.
I drove out to the little country school where I invested seven years of my heart and soul into my program.

Those people out there were like family. My job was my second home. And I had to walk away from it. I know how silly it sounds to be that invested in a J.O.B.
But it's who/how I am. 100%.

I am still angry, but not the fury I had. I still hate that stupid asshole who ruined my job for me, but not in an immediate way. She's not on my mind all the time and what happened isn't in front of me all the time, either. Time has smoothed things over for me a little.

So I managed the journey. It's a different school district than the one I work in, and they're having classes through Tuesday this week. So they're in session and we're not. Perfect timing.

I only saw the two office ladies and the principal. All of them were really happy to see me. I got hugs and exclamations of surprise and I was really glad I'd managed to get out there. They told me that I am, "Very, very missed. Things are absolutely not the same in that program without you. They really made a mistake in allowing you to go."

I told them that I've ended up in a good place. That I am not being micromanaged, that I'm being treated with respect by the school and families and that even though I really miss the school and the people, it was the right decision for me to make.

Debby asked me with a little twinkle, "So, did you forgive and forget, then?"

You know the answer to that one, right?
"I'm not Jesus and I don't have Alzheimer's."

They all laughed. I laughed along with them. They know what I think about Fluffy and her bunch of twats.

I was okay. I didn't cry. I didn't have a hard time pulling into the parking lot. I had been expecting it, but it didn't happen.

And I don't know why, really, but it improved my outlook on life for the rest of the day. I feel... better.

The only thing left to do is to run into Fluffy sometime.
I'll need a bigger car for that, though.

I can still laugh...

A former co-worker messaged me on Facebook yesterday.

"Want to come help me tie dye this week?"

First, this former co-worker isn't a bad person, but she's one of those shameless ass-kissers, too. She really doesn't hate anyone else, but won't hesitate to throw people under the bus if it advances her in any way.

I couldn't believe she messaged me with that. Seriously.
I've been gone for a year now. She knows it. She has a little inkling of why I left, although I didn't confide in her about any of it, she worked in a different district, I hardly ever saw her anyway.

We've never even really been acquaintances.

And considering I left the company in a not-so-happy frame of mind, why would she think I would do anything at all to help the company?

I considered not answering her at all.
But instead I messaged her back.

What do you think? Think she got the message?
My FB told me she read it about five minutes after I sent it.
You do know I don't work for the Cavalcade of Cunts anymore, right? I'm working somewhere that my talents are appreciated/compensated and where the manager doesn't shit on people. Kind of nice. I wish you luck with the dyeing, but Fluffy and her minions can kiss my ass. I wouldn't cross the street to pee on her if I saw her on fire.

Well, I am going to try it

This is the last week of school in new and my old district. We get out Wednesday, but they go one more day, not getting out until Thursday.

I have wanted to go out and say hi to the people I worked with for so many years. They were so nice to me and treated me like part of the team. But I haven't been able to do it. I think about it. I visualize driving into the parking lot and getting out of my car and the look of surprise on their faces and realize that I wouldn't be able to do it without tears.

To tell you the truth, I don't know if I can do it now, either. But I feel like the time is right for me to do it and I have to at least try.

So I am considering doing it tomorrow morning after my shift, it just feels like the right time.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In other news, I am still trying to pack my program. Scaling waaaay back on the stuff... most of what was there wasn't being used by me or the kids anyway. A great deal of programming has been brought in by me. The toys, the art supplies, the trifold boards that up until this afternoon decorated our walls, the photographs of the kids that hung on the bulletin board until I took them down today and gave them to the kids, too.

SDI (Secret Daycare Inc) is a non-profit organization. Which means they just throw money away at an alarming rate. We were told at the last site director meeting that I attended (missed one last week 'cause I was sick) that we are NOT to bring back books, games that aren't brand new, stuff that the kids don't really use much... 'Just throw it in the dumpster, we'll buy things that the kids DO use' they said.

I have a very small amount of storage, and I have to keep things in closed containers.

It infuriates me and once again tells me these people are unprofessional and a bunch of airheads sort of pisses me off that I am cleaning up more than 25 years of other people's stuff without any assistance. Today I found a 1 quart bucket stuffed full of fun foam scraps. None of them were bigger than a dime. I am not kidding.
I've recycled bags and bags of paper things like carefully copied (like 50 copies of each!!) and clipped together, hundreds and hundreds of coloring sheets and stuff that I would not use in a million years. And I have no place to put all of it even if I thought I was going to use it.

I did tell my manager person in writing that I am not up to doing it all, that I will deal with programming items but that someone will need to come out and help me when school gets out.

If they don't send someone to help me (and I am done asking, so either they will or they won't... not my goddamn problem.)

I'll make sure my stuff is ready for fall, make sure it's placed in its proper place in the 'storage tunnel', bring home everything that would cost me more than $50.00 to replace.

I'll leave the rest to be thrown in the dumpster by the demolition crew.

Don't forget, starting Monday I am to be running the LEGO camp. I want them to have fun activities to go along with the building, and am planning all that, too. I have 24 kids registered. That ought to keep me busy.
And with the cleanup of my site, the lack of support from the manager person... well, feeling just a little overwhelmed.

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And.
Still coughing and coughing and coughing.
When I blow my nose it's almost exactly like rubber cement... except rubber cement isn't poisonous green.

But no more fever.

I don't feel like complete crap. More like.. incomplete crap, I guess.

And how are YOU doing??

Well that's awkward...part 1

This morning when Gabriel's mom dropped him off, I asked her if she would need a fall registration packet, as I have one with her name on it.

She said no, that they recently moved and that Gabriel is just finishing the school year with his class (and me) and that he would be attending school next year in the district where I used to work.

Then, she said, "Have you ever heard of Fluffy's Disastrous Day Care?"

I said, "Yes, I worked there for 12 years. I quit to come here."

"Oh! Then you know a lot about it! What do you think?"

"It would be unprofessional of me to tell you everything I find wrong with them, but I can tell you that a lot depends on which site director you have. What school will Gabriel be attending?"

She told me.
Shit.

Although I have no experience with that person, I am still in contact with Carey. Until Fluffy forced her out, she was the site director there.

Her friends still work in that school and they keep her up to date on what's going on there.

The site director this year was horrible and mean to an autistic child and his parents ended up not only removing him from the program, but there was talk of them filing a lawsuit. I don't know if they did, but I wouldn't blame them.

And Gabriel is autistic. Or his mannerisms and almost complete lack of speech lead me to think that. I haven't actually received an official diagnosis. I don't need one, of course, I treat her child the way I'd want someone to treat mine. He's a nice little boy. Just different.

So I said, "I don't personally know the site director there. I would suggest that you go by while school is still in session this year and observe the program. See what you think. And that you drop in unannounced if you decide to place Gabriel there."

She thanked me. Looked like I'd given her food for thought.
I hope she doesn't enroll her child in that program, but the sad thing is, there are very few child care choices and most of them are crap. I don't know a nice way to say that.

And Fluffy is a shitty manager who hires assholes to run the programs. It's pretty amazing to see how many programs are now in the low double digits or even down into single digit attendance. We were a powerhouse team and we did an amazing job for a company that didn't give a shit for any of us.

Today seemed to be my day for awkward conversations regarding day care.
I'll tell you about the other one next time.

Why hasn't someone noticed?

Like a corporate someone. It's not like no one has tried to fucking TELL them.

During my vacation, I talked to Sunshine on the phone and got caught up on what's been going on at my old job. None of it was a surprise, as I've seen several of the emails that go out.

Fluffy Jr. is too stupid to remove my name from at least one of her mass lists. She's also too stupid to walk and chew gum at the same time. But of course she's Fluffy's creature, so giving her an IQ test would only show the rest of the world her incompetent mental state in a measurable way.
It's not like it's a secret, really.

One of the things they've implemented from on high are 'Junior Counselors'. Because they think since they tell the kids that their programs are "just like camp" they're going to believe it.

But I'm thinking that when they're being forced to sit at the teacher's feet in a circle and listen to a 30 minute lecture on gravity, they're too smart to believe the bullshit. Camp indeed.

The Jr. Counselors get to wear little badges on lanyards around their necks. They're 'special'. Better than the other kids by simple virtue of being older. First in line, special helper kids!
Horse shit.

I didn't appreciate the high-handed methods of Fluffy and her cavalcade of cunts anyway. The 'we're going to do this, this and THIS in ALL the programs, regardless of how well it will work for you or for your kids.' They're REAL EDUCATORS and don't you dare forget it!

I'm not a fan of placing children above each other anyway.
Although I try not to be too overbearing, I have to be the one in charge.
All of us remember the kids who were the teacher's pet in school. I know I'm not alone in remembering how much I disliked those kids. I sure wasn't alone at the time, they were universally loathed.

When I left my program, there were between 22 and 25 kids in my morning group. There are now eleven on the busiest morning. The PM group is still about the same size as it was, but in examining the roster, most of the names are new kids, not 'mine'. I've heard from several parents whose children are no longer in the program because they're not having fun anymore. They all say things like, "We really miss you."

I miss them, too.

I happen to know that the other two long time employees are leaving at the end of this school year. Can't imagine why, it's such a great company to work for.

Also, Twatwaffle isn't working over break programs. Want to know why? It's because she is directly competing with the company by running a break time camp out of her home. She's getting the money for it and taking the week(s) off.

I wonder who at corporate would like to know that?
And that Fluffy is fully aware of it and has done nothing about it, even though it's clearly stated in their guidelines that it's not okay.

What a bunch of assholes.

So I kept it short. But this post sort of rambles. Feel free to skip.

I sent a brief answer to Robin this morning.


"Thanks for the supportive commentary, Robin. :)

If I had to be honest (and usually I do, even though sometimes it gets me in trouble)
I actually haven't wished for more management.

After spending the last two years trying to do my job with a morally deficient micromanaging power tripping hag ruining absolutely everything I'd spent a decade building, I have great appreciation for the time and space I've had this school year to do what I do so well without interference.

My families have said some great things to me in person.
It's nice to know that other people are hearing it.

Apparently word is getting out around the school, too.
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Then I pasted in the thing I posted here about 'Jamari' wanting to attend my program, said, "See you Thursday" (site director meeting) and signed off.
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I got an email from Jennifer's mom yesterday. It was one of the most complimentary things I've ever read, it made me cry because she gives me so much credit for the personal growth of her child. It's not that I don't appreciate it, but she and Jennifer's dad are really, really good at being parents. They don't try to make her into something she isn't, they recognize how smart she is and how amazing she is and appreciate it.

From her email: "Hopefully you and the family are well and your are still happy in the new workplace.  You have made such a difference, a very positive difference in Jennifer.  She is growing up to be an amazing young lady and you are a big part of who she has become, she is on the right track.  I couldn't believe it when she came home from school this last week  and told us that one of her friends has been cutting herself (yes, I made sure her parents were involved.  She was hospitalized and now in treatment, just returned to school).  Jennifer had all of the right answers... I swear I heard you in the way she described comforting this poor child, brought tears for both of us.... a mother daughter cry session that was a good thing too weird. "

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I can't imagine being told my 10 year old is cutting herself. I don't know if it's realistic to think that my influence helped Jennifer know what to say/do, but I want to believe it.

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Jennifer's mom also had a lot to say about the program that's happening in my old space. The morning program is half the size it was last year. The afternoon program is about the same, but she said she thinks it's because of the convenience, not because people love it. It's no longer a destination sort of program. It sounds like Fluffy hired a rotten piece of shit asshole, which isn't surprising either, but it does make me feel sad. I am glad I left, that bitch killed the joy I'd had in my job and I am glad I don't have to deal with her and the cavalcade of cunts anymore, but I still regret having to go.

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Doesn't matter.
Onward, upward, blah blah blah. I have a great group of kids, the parents are nothing but nice, the school staff has gone out of their way to make me feel welcome and supported and I know that things will grow if I just keep doing what I do.

And on that note, bedtime.
I may have mentioned that I get up at 5.
Which really sucks.

*Does* everything happen for a reason?

I don't believe in a higher power.
I think shit happens.
And sometimes it doesn't happen.
And that things work out.
Except when they don't.

Since there's no way of knowing what would have happened if we didn't take the left turn that led to the car accident or who we'd have married if we hadn't gone to the party and met that great guy, I think it's just our need to have order to things that leads us to believe there's some sort of plan in place.

I think everyone can point to experiences that happened that later led to something good, but I believe those are coincidences.

But consider the following...

I applied for a job at the end of July.
 
My friend Stephanie contacted me after I complained here on my blog about having to go downtown and how very much I disliked the idea. She drove me from my door to the door of the office building, collected me at the door of the office building and brought me safely back to my own door. We were able to catch up a little and I didn't have to worry about traffic, navigation or walking a couple blocks on my recently-surgerized ankle.

I really appreciated the ride and the moral support.

Anxiety is not a rational creature, and it's sort of nice to avoid him, especially when he's gleefully rubbing his hands together in anticipation of watching me as I fall apart internally. I cheated the monster!!

We made a 'sometime in the future' lunch date. Haven't managed that yet, but I haven't forgotten.

The interview went well. They had asked me to come with ideas for lesson plans and be ready to talk about how I've handled various issues with children.
Having just written four weeks of curriculum for the Fluffy the Horrendous Bitch's summer program, I had a pile of it.

So I brought the unit on Insects/Arachnids with me. They seemed impressed. The interview was over an hour long. We went over all sorts of things. I asked them questions, too.
I thought the job would be a good fit. And a few days later I got an email saying that 'it had been a hard decision but they offered the job to someone else'. It was a mass email, there were a few email addresses in the field. Okay.

No explanation. (not that one is required).
My guess was that I was too old.
Not that I look my age, but you can see a bit of arctic blonde in my hair (more of that all the time) and the people conducting the interview were pretty young. Also, I am not a small woman. Of course no one would ever *say* they don't want to hire a person because of either of those things, it does happen.
::shrug::
Doesn't matter anyway, I didn't get the job.

I've been watching the ads on Craigslist. Because I do that. That same organization has advertised three times since the beginning of the school year that they are hiring site directors for their before/after school programs. Huh. Guess they have a high turnover.

Ran into some people I used to work with today.
Other people who've been shit on by Fluffy and her cavalcade. (You and I know that the list grows daily).

Erica is now working for the organization that rejected me. We had a long conversation. She said that the company is very regimented, everything is on a very tight schedule with zero leeway.

They have her writing curriculum even though she told them that she doesn't really know how and would rather not and they said no problem, that she would have to write 'minimal' lesson plans, and she's very tired of all of it. The senior staff is unfriendly, she feels sort of lost and unsupported.

They have weekly site staff meetings that last at least an hour and a half. Weekly! Holy crap. The kids are divided into two groups after their snack and except for 30 minutes at the very end of the days, there is no free play time. I think that's sort of mean, personally. And the group she has is mostly K aged kids. So after spending a whole day in school, they're being directed/herded/bossed around. Very little opportunity to just unwind or decompress.

So I am glad they didn't hire me.

I don't love the company I'm working for right now, but at least I'm not stuck in a regimented place. And I'm not stuck going to meetings all the damn time. Once a month is more than enough for me.
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I stopped at the grocery store on the way home and ran into Mark, who used to work where I did. He was fired because he told the former manager in his area that he was 'twice as good with kids as you are'. She was a twit, and one of the more condescending people I met while working there. She didn't have the nerve to fire Mark herself, she called the big fish and had him do it. And she really was awful with kids. Can't imagine why she was even working for the company, as she really didn't seem to like children at all.
She has moved on now, too. And good riddance.

It's funny to me.
The company hires a lot of assholes as management.
They pat themselves on the back over the amount of money they make as an organization, the 'great' programs and how well they take care of their employees. I recently saw a copy of the email sent out by the CEO in which he laid out all this wonderful stuff. To a person on the outside, it looks lovely. But the intended audience for that email is already ON the inside and I'm pretty sure he's fooling no one.

So, do you think there's a reason for everything?
And if you weren't religious, would you still think that?