I'm a GFH

I'm grateful to have our health benefits through my employer.
It's one of the reasons I didn't do a freakout when Eric lost his job.

But those benefits aren't cheap.
In fact, they take about half my paycheck.
They're less expensive than what I had with the evil empire, but better coverage. Strange but true.

I'm also making about 5 bucks an hour over what those shit-stains-on-the drawers-of-humanity paid me after twelve years of stellar service. Although leaving my school and the families who respected me so much was a more painful experience than I expected, that horrible woman really did me a favor by being such an assbag.

A series of favors.

Parting gifts she didn't even know she was giving.
The biggest one is that I don't have to see her simpering face anymore.

Well, unless our paths accidentally cross.

More money and more respect from my employer.
A six minute commute.
A brand new, beautiful school building in which I have my own space.
Yeah, others use it during the day, but that's not my problem, or not usually.

But here I am again, wandering away from the topic, which is goddamn medical insurance, which costs me more every year. It's stressful to deal with the yearly enrollment thing, too. This year the website was impossible to navigate and I couldn't even compare plans, no matter what I clicked. So frustrating.

It makes it a little less expensive if I take the 'health assessment' survey.
Ten bucks every time the premium comes out of my check or every month, it wasn't exactly clear. But 10 bucks is 10 bucks. And even if it's only once a month, it's still over a hundred bucks at the end of the year.

I haven't done it before because I knew it would be a complete bullshit thing, and I resent the stupidity of a health "care" organization that believes taking a survey is going to do anything to improve my life or the lives of anyone else.

But I'm less able to afford principles this year, so since I was already online I signed up to take the 'important' survey.

In the space of time it takes to blink, I got this exciting email.
"Congratulations! You've successfully created a myProvidence account, and you're ready to take charge of your health."

Well who the fuck was in charge of it before??

I went through all the questions, intentionally leaving things blank when I could get away with it, even though I had the answers.  The less I tell them, the better I feel.

All the standard shit.

1. Are you an evil, nasty smoker?
2. Are you a great, fat hog who deserves to die?
3. Do you feel depressed and wish you weren't a great fat hog who deserves to die?
4. Do you often drink because you're depressed about being a fat hog who deserves to die?
5. Are you a stupid, fat hog who refuses to get a flu shot? You deserve to die!
6. Do you have support of friends and family or have they dismissed you because you're a great fat hog and are they currently waiting for you to die?

I may be paraphrasing a little.
But...

1. I quit smoking 27 years ago.
2. I'm working on the hog thing.
3. I'm not depressed. After finally getting through menopause, I don't seem to have the huge mood extremes that were normal for me most of my adult life.
4. I don't drink alcohol at all. Ever. Just not my thing.
5. I've done as much reading as I can. I have talked to more than one medical professional, too. My old doctor not only refused a flu shot for herself, but would not suggest her family members get one.
I understand why some people get the shot, and I respect their choices.
I ask for the same courtesy.
6. Yes, I have friends and family. I'm not sure what they're waiting for, but I hope it's not my demise.

After the survey was complete, they gave me a handy report (also in the time it takes to blink) to tell me that I'm a great, fat hog who deserves to die.

I looked carefully on each page of that 'important' survey.
There was not a single place to click to tell them to fuck off.