I'm ready to have things be finished. Really I am.

 

One of the reasons I try not to discuss political stuff unless I know someone pretty well is that so many people have a picture in their heads of what's real and right and are rabid when someone suggests a different viewpoint.

::sigh::

I've been chatting online with a group of women since 1998.
No, not a typo.
Way back in the days of AOL chat rooms and actual hosts, I hosted twice weekly chats in AOL's Homefront Hall, part of a forum dedicated to homeschooling.

We formed friendships based on common ground and 'watched' each other's children grow up and go on to their own lives. With the exception of two of us, everyone else is a grandma now, some of them have grandchildren who are 12 years old already. (insert obligatory 'wow, time flies' comment here)

And since my life is a series of digressions (gotta be the ADD way I do everything)... My own children have decided they don't want to have babies. I'm disappointed because I'd love to have grandchildren, but I've told my kids *multiple* times that having a baby 'cause your mom wants to be a grandma is  NOT a good reason to reproduce. Ha. I can't imagine smacking them over the head with it or showing any kind of disappointment.
I got to make my choices, I respect theirs.
Neither one arrived at the decision without a great deal of thought and discussion.
My kids are smart and capable.

I'd be a good grandma, though. Craft projects and cookie baking and really bad jokes. What's not to like?

So about those chat friends.
We had a great deal in common, but there were things we didn't agree on, too.
Politics and religion, the perennial favorites. Things like nutrition and being strict Vegan or eating whatever you want or (my personal philosophy pass the damn sugar) and curriculum (or no curriculum) etc. But there were so many things we liked about one another that long after AOL dumped their forums and chats we continued to catch up with each other once a week.

We've continued to do so. 22 years now that the four of us have stayed in touch. (Actually 5 of us, but one doesn't always manage to get to the chats, we all have lives and some are busier than others)

There have been marriages, divorces and grandchildren and cross-country moves. Job losses, loss of family members, financial difficulties, mental illness. We've supported each other through all of it, and some of us have even met each other in person.

Those 'imaginary friends' as my family has called them more than once, are as important to me as some of my friends who live nearby.
I am happy when something good happens for one of them, sad for them when things aren't going well. We text each other. Occasionally chat on the phone. I care deeply about each one of them.

Until recently, we've all managed to make it to our chats on Friday nights.

But one of my friends doesn't want to be there for awhile. She's not able to do political discussion without anger over the disagreements. I'm not actually certain about who she voted for, but she has so much going on in her personal life right now that any conflict is too much.

And it makes me sad.

I wish everyone could discuss issues instead of people.

I don't believe about half of the crap I hear from both sides. I know I'm not alone.

:::sigh:::

WHEN will this be over?