Five Days ago...

Well six, now, since you're reading this on a Sunday...

Lyssa and I stood at the back of my car in the parking lot at the school. Our morning shift was over, we were heading to Goodwill and then home. Our usual routine is to toss our backpacks in the trunk so they're not sitting in the car, visible to someone passing by. It's not unusual for people to break a window in your car to take a purse or pack off the seat.

She tossed hers into the trunk and then I put mine in. Usually by the time I get mine off my shoulders, she is already in the car and buckled up. But she stood there. I turned to her and she said, "I just want to give you a hug."

So we hugged.

And as we got into the car, she started to cry a little.

When I asked her what was wrong, she said that she needed to talk to me about some things.

Lyssa is leaving home. She visited some online friends this summer in North Carolina. She knew them online for quite some time, and they decided to meet. She really hit it off with one guy, and she is in love. She is moving to North Carolina to be with him.

She has been planning it awhile. Hadn't said a word to us. She was afraid we'd be mad. Sad. Would try to talk her out of it. Or think she is stupid.

So after I've had some time to think about it, I am really none of the above. Well, okay, I'll agree to sad. I wish she were not going so far away. I love her, we have a decent relationship, and I have spent most of the last 22 years with her.

I'm not mad, though. She is 21.5 years old. She's not stupid. She's perfectly capable of making choices on her own. I'm not inclined to try to talk her out of it, although I feel pretty comfortable asking her if she's considered this or that. Trying to help her think of everything she needs to bring or do.

Since she told me, I have been trying to help get her outfitted. We've been haunting a few Goodwill stores this week. Found her a great set of luggage. It looks brand new. Four suitcases and an overnight bag for 40 bucks. On Thursday, we found her three pairs of jeans, seven shirts/sweaters, a nice winter coat and a quilted vest for a little under 80 bucks.

She's going through her things, deciding what she needs to take and what she is leaving behind/donating to Goodwill. She isn't sure when she's leaving, they're looking at reservations and deciding soon.

Matt's best man (who is a girl, if you'll recall) lives about four hours away from where Lyssa will be, and she said she's more than willing to be there for her if necessary. My friend Karen in Florida has said the same thing. And I am part of a private homeschooling group on Facebook, and after sharing with the group that she's heading that way and asking for people who are willing to be there if needed, I have a list of names and phone numbers of other homeschooling moms who are local to the area who are willing to provide assistance should it become necessary. It makes it a little easier for me to know she isn't without resources.

I can't stop her from leaving. I don't even want to. She's an adult. So what I can do is help her leave. Make sure she has the things she needs. Give her support.

Yes, they're young. I know at least one other couple who got together very young and are still together many, many years later. My parents were married at 19 and 20, and it's now been 55 years.

Eric and I were even younger. November 1st will be 34 years for us. I know it can work. I also know how hard it is and how many stresses there are. How many things can go wrong. But that if you start from the beginning knowing that the two of you are united against the world and can keep that in front of you, it makes it easier.

She knows that she can always come home.

So that was my week.
How are things where you are?