Settlement?

We have sent an offer of settlement to the comp insurer's attorney.

I have never been motivated by money in my life aside from in the most logical way... I work so I can pay the bills. There is a rather large part of me that hopes they will either say no, we don't want to settle, let's go to hearing on the 17th or that they'll come back with such a low offer that I can laugh at them and say 'you and the horse you rode in on, buddy'  and we'll go to hearing on the 17th.

I've had long exhaustive conversations with everyone who knows anything about work comp and about my case in particular.

Evidently going to hearing would not be in the opposing side's best interest, but you know, that hasn't stopped them yet. They have lost every time there's been conversation with a judge, and they'd lose this time, too.

Had the system just taken care of business the way they were supposed to in the first place, this would have been settled and over a long time ago.

If we go to hearing this time, I am ready.
And I will be heard.
Isn't that why they call it a hearing?

I didn't understand last time. Didn't understand the procedure, didn't know what sort of opportunity to speak I'd have, didn't know much of anything about it. This time I do.

I am prepared.

I am ready to talk about asking everyone involved with my case for help and how I've been treated.

Ready to tell the judge about many things that have occurred.

I am absolutely ready.

Being able to tell a judge exactly what's gone on would be cathartic for me and provide me with immense satisfaction on a visceral level.

So like I said, mixed feelings.

At this point, I don't know what will happen. And I mostly don't care. Either they'll settle or I will finally get my opportunity to say what needs to be said.

I am glad that money isn't what motivates me, as my indifference toward it causes me to be able to have a clear head. To be thoughtful and analytical without the craziness.

If I can pay the electric bill, and I have gas in my car so I can get to work, my needs are pretty much met. Oh, and the internet. That's fairly important.

But I have those things now. :)

Anyway, if nothing else, this has been quite instructive. I've learned a lot about all kinds of things.

Now I'm heading off to bed.
I have been sleeping pretty well since I got past the insomnia after being so sick, but did the reflux thing last night. I'd prefer not to do that again for awhile.

Tomorrow I'll tell you a funny story from Thursday's program. No school Thursday or Friday this week. We combine all our programs at one location. It's a lot of fun to connect with kids I see only occasionally and to get to know ones I haven't met before.

I love my job. :)